Thursday, June 01, 2006
a few things on the mind...
maybe it's just post-holiday syndrome that when you come back to your life and look at it and think I'd rather be somewhere else, doing something else... yeah it's prob just post-holiday and def post-bali…
it was BEAUTIFUL! I have pics somewhere... sorry i can't put a link on here to show you a glimpse of what it was like. i can send an email :) but anyway I don't think the pics do it justice, the smells, sounds, people, food and feelings makes it something different. for me, a few of my fav things were
- the towels in the villas, they smelt good and were thick and really soft,
- playing with the frangipanis, they smelt even better
- sleeping in double-queen sized beds with fat pillows all to myself!
- waking up and putting swimmers on (reminded me of our fiji trip!)
- having poached eggs (nearly) every morning
and yes of course the wedding! jaime looked gorgeous and her dress was soooo beautiful, Tim has an older brother so I actually have 2 brother-in-laws (that works right?) they're very english and proper, hehe I love it! I think the hardest thing for me was not having any of my friends there… it’s different meeting new people and getting to know them, and everyone else had someone. Funny I got asked a lot if I had a boyfy or where he was… ha it was a bit of a joke as now Jaime has an Englishman, sarah’s boyfy is English and so where’s my Englishman??
Anyway it was nice to be able to get away for a bit and escape responsibility and expectations of work and so on. But now I’m back and the holiday feels like a distant memory, it’s straight back into it and somehow I feel less energetic, somewhat apathetic towards what I’m doing. Had a talk to the boss today and lots of stuff is happening and the next 12months will be huge, which is cool. I just can’t seem to get excited about it. Don’t know why… and then mention of pay came up and it turns out that there’s no increase in salary or anything even though he knows I deserve to be paid more, but can’t afford to do so. Which I’m bummed about but also quite adamant to not let it get to me, as I know it’s just money and I don’t want that to be the reason behind what I do. But still have that niggly feeling about it all… worse of I’m not sure what everyone else is getting paid and so don’t feel like I can go about demanding a raise. Sigh I know God knows what I deserve and I went into this job acknowledging the fact that God knows how much I can handle financially and if I am faithful with the little things he will entrust me with more. I don’t want my worth to be justified by man, or money or things that I do, cuz I know to God I’m worth more than that… but is that enough? hmm I dunno
Ahh and then another thing is that an incredibly close friend from high school asked about working in our company. I’m really in two minds about this and have no idea what to do/say. It could go really well or really bad, thing is she would be really good we have similar work styles and get on super well. But don’t want it to effect our relationship. I know some people feel strongly that you shouldn’t work with friends/family and others say just give it a go… I really need to pray about this…
Anyway I’m trying to plan my next holiday… you always need something to look forward to and Vietnam is next on the list… I really can’t wait, but I know I have too.
it was BEAUTIFUL! I have pics somewhere... sorry i can't put a link on here to show you a glimpse of what it was like. i can send an email :) but anyway I don't think the pics do it justice, the smells, sounds, people, food and feelings makes it something different. for me, a few of my fav things were
- the towels in the villas, they smelt good and were thick and really soft,
- playing with the frangipanis, they smelt even better
- sleeping in double-queen sized beds with fat pillows all to myself!
- waking up and putting swimmers on (reminded me of our fiji trip!)
- having poached eggs (nearly) every morning
and yes of course the wedding! jaime looked gorgeous and her dress was soooo beautiful, Tim has an older brother so I actually have 2 brother-in-laws (that works right?) they're very english and proper, hehe I love it! I think the hardest thing for me was not having any of my friends there… it’s different meeting new people and getting to know them, and everyone else had someone. Funny I got asked a lot if I had a boyfy or where he was… ha it was a bit of a joke as now Jaime has an Englishman, sarah’s boyfy is English and so where’s my Englishman??
Anyway it was nice to be able to get away for a bit and escape responsibility and expectations of work and so on. But now I’m back and the holiday feels like a distant memory, it’s straight back into it and somehow I feel less energetic, somewhat apathetic towards what I’m doing. Had a talk to the boss today and lots of stuff is happening and the next 12months will be huge, which is cool. I just can’t seem to get excited about it. Don’t know why… and then mention of pay came up and it turns out that there’s no increase in salary or anything even though he knows I deserve to be paid more, but can’t afford to do so. Which I’m bummed about but also quite adamant to not let it get to me, as I know it’s just money and I don’t want that to be the reason behind what I do. But still have that niggly feeling about it all… worse of I’m not sure what everyone else is getting paid and so don’t feel like I can go about demanding a raise. Sigh I know God knows what I deserve and I went into this job acknowledging the fact that God knows how much I can handle financially and if I am faithful with the little things he will entrust me with more. I don’t want my worth to be justified by man, or money or things that I do, cuz I know to God I’m worth more than that… but is that enough? hmm I dunno
Ahh and then another thing is that an incredibly close friend from high school asked about working in our company. I’m really in two minds about this and have no idea what to do/say. It could go really well or really bad, thing is she would be really good we have similar work styles and get on super well. But don’t want it to effect our relationship. I know some people feel strongly that you shouldn’t work with friends/family and others say just give it a go… I really need to pray about this…
Anyway I’m trying to plan my next holiday… you always need something to look forward to and Vietnam is next on the list… I really can’t wait, but I know I have too.
# posted by kristy : 9:57 pm
