Thursday, April 07, 2005
Nothing is worse than a nasty cup of coffee
ok there is, and that's TWO CUPS! Yes I had two really na-sty coffees today, urgh... those instant ones with everything in it already, and powdered creamier. gross... ha whoever said life is too short for depressos is SOOO true!
Anyways... it's been one of those days when I wish I was back in NZ, mainly so I could close my eyes and walk home at night down North Rd. mehh... so couldn't do that here! I'd bump into people and things and there's always cars and people around, I just want it all to be quiet... shhh shhh
That's what I loved about living in the valley, so that I could have those times alone to think, or just clear my mind... it's so hard doing that here. You're constantly surrounded by people talking on their phones really loudly, or phones ringing, cars honking and roaring by, or even in the buses, the roadshow tv screen blares on... there is no escape! ahhhh
Yesterday we went out for a hike in Sai Kung and to a beach... and it was sooo nice just falling asleep on the beach with the sound of the waves and the feel of sand between your toes. hmm let's pretend it's Fiji baby
so yes there is a lot on my mind at the moment, nothing in particular, and yet everything at the same time
sigh... I think the whole idea that my life can change at any moment now is actually scaring me. Am I ready? I thought I was, but now part of me is wanting to hold back, it's not the best, but at least I know what it's like. The uncertainty of the future and what it holds. ha why am I always like this? Like what? Like the way I am... how many times have I been through this, to yet go through it again and again? Is my faith that weak? Don't I trust God enough to know He always has the best for me and promises a future of hope and blessing? I guess the reason we continue to go through times like these is to take our eyes off the world and the finite life it offers, build up our faith, and draw us closer to the one who does promise us good things. It's just that when we're in those situations it's never that obvious.
ok, I just need to get over it... so I got a job offer today, I have a few days to think about it and will have to get back to them early next week. I'm thinking I'll take it, ok yes, I will. woohooo I got a job! shh, I haven't even told them yet ha
Anyways... it's been one of those days when I wish I was back in NZ, mainly so I could close my eyes and walk home at night down North Rd. mehh... so couldn't do that here! I'd bump into people and things and there's always cars and people around, I just want it all to be quiet... shhh shhh
That's what I loved about living in the valley, so that I could have those times alone to think, or just clear my mind... it's so hard doing that here. You're constantly surrounded by people talking on their phones really loudly, or phones ringing, cars honking and roaring by, or even in the buses, the roadshow tv screen blares on... there is no escape! ahhhh
Yesterday we went out for a hike in Sai Kung and to a beach... and it was sooo nice just falling asleep on the beach with the sound of the waves and the feel of sand between your toes. hmm let's pretend it's Fiji baby
so yes there is a lot on my mind at the moment, nothing in particular, and yet everything at the same time
sigh... I think the whole idea that my life can change at any moment now is actually scaring me. Am I ready? I thought I was, but now part of me is wanting to hold back, it's not the best, but at least I know what it's like. The uncertainty of the future and what it holds. ha why am I always like this? Like what? Like the way I am... how many times have I been through this, to yet go through it again and again? Is my faith that weak? Don't I trust God enough to know He always has the best for me and promises a future of hope and blessing? I guess the reason we continue to go through times like these is to take our eyes off the world and the finite life it offers, build up our faith, and draw us closer to the one who does promise us good things. It's just that when we're in those situations it's never that obvious.
ok, I just need to get over it... so I got a job offer today, I have a few days to think about it and will have to get back to them early next week. I'm thinking I'll take it, ok yes, I will. woohooo I got a job! shh, I haven't even told them yet ha
# posted by kristy : 5:38 am
