i am kristy

imagini.. me

2007-07-01T10:04:00.001+08:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

2007-05-20T22:13:00.000+08:00

[fact] my God loves me

rainy saturdays

2007-05-19T16:13:00.000+08:00

i literally cannot see anything outside my window, the rain and haze is thick and hangs outside my window like a blanket... since there's nothing outside to see, what else can you do but look inside.

inside...

lately, its been somewhat of a void. an empty vessel longing for some breathe of life, even an ounce of some energy to run through the veins and make it remember why its here. sadly it knows where to go, but the struggles of knowing and doing is a constant battle within the mind of laziness, guilt, shame, apathy and fear. turn to the source. it's hard, i know. knowing what to do sometimes and yet not wanting to do it out of automation, simply returning to the default. restore factory settings the label says. it shouldn't be like that. but more so about wanting to have that real passion and desire to want more. that's the difference, the desire, the longing, knowing that there is more than this. but what is here now is not bad, not bad at all. just need to realise that it's only part of what there is to be. one step a long the way. there's more to come. much more ahead. be thankful.

[ok]

its gone

2007-04-23T20:52:00.000+08:00

time. i missing it. it's passing me by, and moving on too fast that i can't seem to keep up. constantly two steps behind.

just stop for a moment. let me catch my breathe. will it wait for me or just keep going on. it seems to do that.

always wanting more and can never get enough. we all have the same amount of it and are the only ones that can decide how to spend it. help me to know that i am where i am, and that it's the right place for me now.

i've come a long way...

2007-02-11T00:46:00.000+08:00

hmm just read my posts from this time last year and the year before

2005 - recently back in HK. settling back into the home, trying to find a job, growing leg hair, CNY hike...

2006 - just did the half-marathon haa the pain

and now? well i've been in my job for nearly 2 years... have a new title as 'project manager', i'm training a new person [hopefully to take over my role, so i could leave if i wanted to] though i just got a raise! wohoo which is good as it'll pay for all my holidays: newyork+nacadogches, leading a missions team into china this easter [4 canadians + 1 kiwi... so far. need a mandarin speaker!], then LA+vancouver+edmonton for mel's wedding and hopefully going to see gwen stefani while we're there. and that's only the next 5 months! sooo exciting im so tired i can hardly sleep!!

the coolest thing is that those years ago who would have known it would be like this? not i.. which makes the next few years sound cool, cuz it's just going to get better!

i am yeet hei

2007-02-05T20:36:00.000+08:00

ohh i just switched to the new blog style which links to your gmail... google is pretty amazing! i think i fancy it, a lot. wow thanks for your comments, i do feel loved as i didn't think ppl even checked this anymore, well unless you have one of those things which tell you when someone has blogged

so back to the title and my current status, if you're not chinese it's a really really hard thing to explain. basically i know when i am yeet hei is when i get mouth ulcers and i'm constantly parched and tired, it's brought on by stress and lack of sleep and not eating well. it effects your whole body and your system is really weak. is there an english equivilant? we've had many a discussion on this topic and what it means in english but to this day still have not found a satisfying answer [strange that]

on another note it's 9 days (i had to pause and count my fingers) til i go to New York and TX!! i'm soooo super excited you don't understand. i just wanna go NOW! but know that there's lots of work to do before i go.. alas back to reality for a few more days and then i'll be off. i think the best things about this trip is going to newyork and seeing my sis+tim, and THEN the very next day I fly to houston to see abbey whom i haven't seen in over 2 years! ohmigosh it's been that long!! ohhh I'm suddenly a little nervous... what if 'things' are different?! hah well we know that since there's a brett in her life so I can't wait to hear all about him, yesyes hun you have to update me all about that and i'm looking forward to finally going to java jacks! all those years of hearing about it, so i'll finally get to get to have my moment with it. and i plan to have a moment [or two] and spend the weekend with her and her wonderful family. is aunt D gonna be there? I think she lives somewhere else... and since abs has to work something, i'll head back to snowy cold newyork to wander the urban raw streets in downtown and the little boutiques and cafes in soho, go through second hand stores and spend the days reading in bookstores and cafes and watch steam rise from the gratings and eat hotdogs with lots of onions+sauce... hmm and i don't even like hotdogs!

oh well maybe that among other things on this trip will be the adventure!

:007 let's start again

2007-01-29T22:47:00.000+08:00

I can't believe I've left this site for so long.. poor thing, I think everyone's forgotten about now. which means I have the 'freedom' of writing whatever I feel like without thinking that there would actually be an audience. which is a funny way to start this off again, as that's how I started blogging

Anyway... I've come along way since then. matured in some ways, grown in others, realised more things about myself than I would admit, as I have been in denial about some things. Hmm it's funny how you come to a point when you have to let everything go of what you know and have known and be completely abandoned to something, someone higher than yourself. For me, this realisation has come after a 21day of fasting+prayer. Though I confess that I didn't and wasn't strong enough, nor disciplined enough to stick through it the full 21 days... but that's besides the point. The areas I fasted, which thankfully didn't include coffee or chocolate the usual things I would do, but were other significant areas of my life which were actually more difficult than I thought they would be. From that time of denial of my sleep-ins, friends (I'll explain that) and shopping I've discovered truths in myself that had been hiding.

Soo you fasted friends, you laugh? It was a funny thing to fast, but at the time I was so completely challenged by God that if I really wanted Him, and loved Him, why wouldn't I give up my friends just to be with him? It was only for 21days anyway... the three things He asked me straight in the face were:

1. I choose you. do you choose me?
2. I pick you. do you pick me?
3. I love you. do you love me?

and hence I chose to give up the time I'd spend with friends, and other things I did to pre-occupy my time, or distract me to be with Him. Though throughout the three weeks, I ended up spending more time watching MGM and spent more time on facebook and the likes... making up for physical friendships I had choosen to go without. Sigh... but despite all that and my weaknesses, God is good and patient and chose to reveal things to me and not just more of himself, but more about me.

Its kinda hard to say what I've been going through, I can't even try to put it in words, but the feeling is there and it's real and I know that each day is a new one, where I can spend getting to know My Lord and just know Him. It's not about what I can do and what I've done or going to do for Him, He knows that already, but what he really wants is just me. That's it. And it's been a real eye-opener and soul-stretching time to just accept that. And as I continue to struggle in my flesh of wanting to prove myself through my works and justify the blessings and gifts that are given to me, God whispered to me last night"Abide in me and I will abide in you."

That's all I have to do... and that's what I'm going to do this year and from now on

vietnam - what the pho?

2006-10-26T20:47:00.000+08:00

haha this is how i remembered how to order the yumyum beef noodles, i just kept sayign taht in my head funny... and yes pretty much ate it every day! love it

click here to view some pics from my trip

the traffic was crazy, you basically just walk out onto oncoming motorbikes and they end up driving around you. though keep in mind, trucks don't care... they don't stop!

the trip itself was interesting, rather educational and historical as we visited the war museum, renunification hall, cu chi tunnels, mekong delta, the rex hotel, notre dame cathedral, post office, markets... though the markets were pretty much the same as in hkg, so didn't do much of that

it was good.. though i think next time would like to go up north as its suppose to be nicer and more scenic.. hmm yes next time!

alive n kicking

2006-10-09T22:12:00.000+08:00

well well.. it's been a while, a month and 8 days to be exact. oh dear what's been going on?! shaz+wends were here for a few days which was awesome to have some kiwiana here. they brought over cheese and chocolates and some good old nz music which was much appreciated!it's funny whenever you have friends visiting who haven't know this side of your life before, showing them what you do and go to, allowing them to see it all. it's a bit crazy and overwhelming, and gives you a chance to look at your own life and wonder, why do i do these things or live like this? hmm interesting

anyway the following weekend was awesome! the cleansing stream retreat... i knew this course would be a life changing one, but also i felt like i hadn't put in as much as i should of with the teaching, homework and reading and felt really bad about that. the week before the retreat we all did a corporate fast for 3 days, and i fasted tv (lost + prison break), coffee, chocolate and just ate vegs+fruit. i know some people don't really get the idea of fasting, but it's not just denying yourself food, cuz that's starving yourself, but including that with prayer and just focusing on God in that time and spending time with him. i think the hardest thing was not having coffee, as i found it really affected my work, concentration, i kept forgetting things and had bad headaches (hmm this was only for three days...!) it was interesting cuz in this time God was teaching me a few things through different situations and relationships and i realised how prideful i have been, trying to be so self-sufficient, not trusting people or not allowing myself to be vunerable. so that was a bit of an eye-opener and from there have been allowing God to really humble me and speak through my life to rely on him alone and not on my own abilities. so it was good. the retreat itself was soooo releasing! like i felt a huge weight lift off me, as cliche as that sounds, but its so true! I can't explain it, but there were so many things in my life that i had been holding on to and not realising how it had effected my relationship with christ as it was stopping me from really trusting Him, allowing him to love me and this influenced the rest of my life. so being able to pray through those issues, repent, renounce, break and release them, and allow God to heal those areas has been really good... and it's an on going process as you all know. i'm realising that i don't have to be perfect or a certain way to receive God's love. i can just be me

next up... i've been really blessed with amazing friends, old ones and new ones.. ones that are across the seas and hours away, and others whom I see everyday. i love it and it's been really good catching up with people more regularly, esp you guys from dunners whom i've been really bad in keeping in touch. but its awesome to see how strong our friendships still are after such long periods of silence :) and then the super amazing people i've met in hk, over the past year God has seriously shown me his love through his people, and i love being able to crash over places and not feel unwelcomed or like i'm overstaying. funny i have sets of clothing and toothbrushes at several places now! haha tho i do my part by taking out the rubbish at tammy+nat's place (i NEVER do this at home!!) and paying 'rent' in the form of tram rides and taxis with mandy+sam hehe - love you guys, i do!

and something rather exciting is being a 180 leader! I didn't think i would step into this role as it is quite a commitment and again, thinking i'm not good enough or able to, but God doesn't look at that. i just want to serve Him and his people and at this time, this is where he wants me to be. and so i just have to be obedient. but i do love what the ministry is about and know God is doing and will do amazing stuff through it! so i'm really looking forward for what's to come...

and coming up is my trip to vietnam!! i'm soo excited, mainly because i just want to go away for a while. the last time was in may - j+tim's bali wedding. and since then my boss was away for nearly 8 weeks, so it has been full on and crazy at work! Im taking my mum, which will be interesting... in a good way, as i haven't really spent much time with her before. so it'll be a chance to get to know her... funny saying that as it's my mum, but i'm hardly home and never see the parents. the past weekend i was home for 3 hours in total, including sleeping! crazy... i've got great parents, just haven't made the time for them, which is kinda sad.

anyway, lost is on and just did a marathon of the end of season 2 yesterday... trying to get up to date for the 3rd one! muahaaa

living in hk suburbia

2006-09-01T21:24:00.000+08:00

well it's been a week since we've moved out to the wapps... sham tseng. for some reason i was so anti moving out there, i think the whole idea of living in little matchbox apartments in high rised buildings in a housing complex with a club house and resident id cards was something i couldn't imagine, or a lifestyle i could live. especially at a time when i was really getting tired of hk and the city life, and just wanted to get away, go on holiday, be in a place where i didn't have to do anything, return calls, answer emails, go to meetings ahh... so now here we are on the 58th floor. i'm not scared of heights or anything, but its just that claustrophobic feeling of being crammed into these apts, with 7-8 other apts on the same floor, 71 floors high, 9 blocks... which makes nearly 4500 households in one complex! how crazy... and so the first few nights we were there, i ended up crashing at neena's on fri and then mandy's on sat... and then there's always tammy+nat's... hah i could do this all the time and live on the island all weekend!

I'm slowly getting used to the place and the view is amazing... this is the pool from my window at night and see sky and the sea and hear the boats at night, it's rather nice... i actually can sleep with my window open! love it... at first i was treating like a holiday in itself, being far away, different people, views, things to see and do... so its been kinda fun! almost feels like a little village in SEA or somewhere and i can practice my chinese with the 'locals' and there are so many guards so it's really safe. i haven't checked out the club house yet, so will do and if anyone feels like a trip out of the city, come visit!!

the only sucky thing is transport.. it's currently eating away at my bank account. by bus one way is $18.40 though it only takes me 30mins to get into central which is pretty sweet and the ride is quite cool, we go over a bridge and through a couple of tunnels. and on the way home i can take an overnight mini-bus which goes under these orange metal frame things (don't know what they're called) but it's my favourite part. the funny thing is that i met a guy who was in the year above me in my sis sarah's year on the bus one night.. how random!

oh speaking of random... we went on the NZ navy friggate when it was in town last week which was really cool. I was just excited to go on the boat and then when we were near by i realised that there were going to be all these sailors onboard in their uniforms and everything hehe... tho they didn't wear their hats booo... anyway one of the sailors there was in my uni!! it was so weird... and he recognised me too and came and chatted. we were in the same marketing classes though we never talked before, and graduated at the same time and then he joined the navy. small world!! the maori culture group did some perform, which made me miss nz. it was pretty intense as they dedicated it to the maori queen who recently passed away, so it was pretty emotional and i was standing right at the front. incredible stuff

so i'm living it up in hk at the mo. this week has been pretty crazy at work... i don't think i got home before 12 ... so i'm excited the week is over and i don't have to go to work tomorrow. we celebrated in the office with some cakes which are always good. and today we had 2 new people join the marketing team and on monday a new designer is coming in wohooo i'm so excited, i'm not saying who it is yet, as some of you will know who they are and they can tell you themselves :P

(mandy this post was for you, since i know you like staying up late on friday nights reading everyone's blogs! haha)

i art jammed

2006-08-25T20:06:00.000+08:00

kristy... MA ha ha

2006-08-05T14:27:00.000+08:00

i'm house sitting for derek&jan ma for 3 weeks and well i survived my first night at the their place... just.

it took me a few minutes to unlock the door, i kept unlocking then locking it again, i still haven't figured it out
i couldn't open the washer/dryer door, and it felt like i was breaking the handle
the fridge is broken and now the new one is only being delivered on the 18th...
i thought the off button was the volume button on the remote control
i tried to use the duvet cover as a fitted sheet
i couldn't find the keys when i was leaving the house and realised they were still in the door!

i'm seriously not that bad at home! though i did have some help... mandylee!!
she cooked a yummmyumm dinner - curry and brown rice
she ate the icecream i didn't like and bought me a new one
she held my bags and supplied the tissues while i made a mess of myself eating a fruit tip icy
she washed the dishes
she helped make the bed

...and
we watched movies
went shopping at 1am and came back to watch another movie
bumped into jess+kimberley on the street
ate chocolate for breakfast
woken up by the drilling upstairs at 9am
fed killer (hamster) 1cm of malt... it was on the instructions!
watered basil

not bad ay? hah... realised i forgot a lot of stuff at home, mainly shoes and bags... so have to do another trip to the dark side haha!!

3 more weeks to go... will keep you updated

OHMIGOSH COLDPLAY!!

2006-07-14T21:26:00.000+08:00

i was getting so excited about going to coldplay, but you know just wanted to play it cool so was like yeah, i'm going to coldplay, it'll be sweet and just going about the day doing the work i needed to do and getting things done, but really my mind was somewhere else...

i was late leaving early (?? not quite an oxymoron) but i did manage to get out of the office before 630pm which in itself is quite amazing! was too excited to eat so just grabbed a pretzel and smoothie and boarded the train to the stadium. it was weird heading out to the airport and not actually flying anywhere... which made me a little sad as i'm really wanting to go away ( sanya baby!!) but that time will come... it was coldplay for the night. the airport express was so crowded with so many people everywhere, just hanging waiting for friends... i guess i was naive in thinking it'll be a pretty quiet night out, but everyone was going as well! we got there and of course we were late! 8:05 it was suppose to start at 8pm... but that was very unlikely... the asiaexpo place was crazy! so many people milling around, and a lot of expats... it kinda felt like the sevens, but not and at the same time like a huge stadium event. i don't even know how many people can fit into asiaexpo, but i imagine it's A LOT.

it was just funny texting people, like tammy+nat, cherie, may, rocky, dan, mari... getting them psyched up and yourself, and bumping into random people there like a friend's sister, and i couldn't remember her name until way later, and it's sarah, same as my sister - doh! and pippa, another friend's sister... i met her when she was 3, she's now 14! i felt old... walking into the bowl section was crazy, it felt like we were in some boxing arena going in to watch a match... cold cement floors, huge long flat section with a stage and elevated seating around. anyway sat down and realised dan was two rows behind us! the music they were playing while we waited was actually pretty good ha...

and THEN IT STARTED!! by that time it was nearly 9... well first, the music changed, the house lights went off and everyone got really excited and stood on their chairs or rushed forward to 'get' closer... ha... they weren't even on stage yet! regardless, it was rather frustrating as i really couldn't see anything :( and not because i'm little, just because the venue was so long that you literally couldn't see the stage, and it wasn't raised up or anything... and on top of that people standing on their chairs arghhhh... so was rather put out. someone even mentioned to just pretend you're listening to them on cd?!?! yeah right

i actually said to someone "DON'T STAND THERE!" ahhh he was standing right in front of me!!! so annoying! the guys we were with were nice and let me stand by the aisle hoping that i'd see better... i could... only see one guitarist... nice. ended up standing on the back of a chair, supported by a friend so i didn't fall over. the rest of the night was sooo sweet... loved it!! they are really good live and they did songs from all albums which was great, as i absolutely love parachutes and rush of blood, ahh good memories. one of the best songs was scientist as he got everyone singing along after him! thanks dan for grabbing me and telling me that chris martin was right behind us - he came all the way down from the stage to the opposite side which was near us. honestly i really wouldn't have noticed!! also managed to get some good vids so that's cool, tho for some reason they won't download off my camera?? weird..

sigh it was a good night... tho by the time it ended was hungry as

1, 2, 3 take foto

2006-07-08T15:51:00.000+08:00

ohh loved the boat trip... it was such a nice day, and well it was HOT!! tho now it feels like it was soooo long ago. boat trips are something you have to do in HK and it's quite amazing going through the harbour and then out to the ocean, passing the islands and mountains, it's really beautiful, a totally different side of HK.

after 180, went to sam's bday and everyone had been in the sun that day and was pretty knackered, but a bqq on the roof and mooching was perfect way to finish the day...

forward to the next weekend, we had our 180 F&B team hang out, which was really fun and of course there was so much food haha

and it was neena's bday and we got her these cute cushion stools and it was a bit of a laugh carrying them around town.

we had dinner at dan ryans the old hang out from school days and watched the world cup... both games... ahhhh

after getting home at 530am we went to ocean park that day! it was soo cool though, despite it being so HOT and us being really tired... the last time i had been was expedition day at kgv... over 10 years ago. funny thing i remembered the dragon being really scary and so was freaking out a bit.. ok A LOT but after i was like, was that IT?!?! pretty lame. hah the funniest was the newer ride, abyss and we were like, it's not scary at all... then when we got on it, it actually was really really high so we started freakin out a bit and laughing and screaming. which totally helps! hah the jellyfish were pretty cool

hmm well that was just last week... there's more to come, i'm tired, excited and managing to get through the day with a little help - love it!

thanks for the reminder

2006-06-29T14:43:00.000+08:00

i know i'm not very regular at posting... esp won't be for the next few weeks since the bosses are away and i kinda have to step up a notch in everything. kinda crazy trying to be so focused on everything and yet feel like you're still missing something.. ahhh and then you have all these other things distracting you that are completely irrelevant to what you have to do

well at least the first week is nearly over and it's been late nights and early mornings, which to be honest i didn't mind for the first few days, but today i was completely shattered waking up... physically and mentally. but once you're on the go you go, but it was cool cuz i was reading my bible on the way to work and esp the 2 Cor 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” soooo it was good to focus on the right things

in saying that, a few things to look forward to july... while i'm focused on the now ha
2 neena's bday, another junk trip maybe, loved the last one... oh will put pics up
13 coldplay baby
15 eph & brooke's wedding
16 blackeyedpeas

oh happy day (oh happy day..)

2006-06-17T09:22:00.000+08:00

my favourite day of this week was thursday...

i can't remember what i was doing at work, but had lunch with a friend, (he ditched me on tues) and so he kindly treated me and THEN he called up when i was finshing work and said he had a coldplay ticket for me!! WohOooOhOOHoHooOO i was soo excited and still am. yeah :) july 13 baby

and then had gone to a friend's place for dinner and realised it was actually a bible study group... which was a bit of a surprise, a nice one at that. And his friend whom i've met a few times accepted Christ!! there's something special about being right there with people who say with their own words, I want to know jesus. so we celebrated after and went for some dessert which is always good

it's was about 10:45pm and the day is still not over, and i was on my way to the bus but wasn't quite ready to go home, so called up mandy and she was just coming back from a run and got to say hi and chat for a bit :) dropping by and saying hi to people isn't something you usually do in hk.. hah the castle street flats, or fat bottom girls were my usual stop offs on the way home, usually for a cuppa or just to pee - love it!

the day after...

2006-06-06T22:02:00.000+08:00

went for a run last nite and it was a first in a long time. but it was GOOD! i'm rather sore today though... stairs are a killer. dude i ran hard, and in the rain, hah... so i was rather wet with sweat and rain by the time i got home. nice. and then i realised i forgot my house keys, and our doorbell doesn't work, so i ended up pacing infront of our door till nearly 10:30pm until i finally got over my stubborness and asked some random passerby to borrow their phone to call home to open the door!

today i'm feeling better about things. have been thinking a lot about stuff and sometimes that isn't good... you just need to get over it, accept it and move on. although eating chocolate helped - i had an oh henry bar today, it was rather tasty.

another thing i'm excited about is 24 tonight wohooo... sam i read on your blog about having to watch it from the start - you're prob right i've only watched the 5th season but it's sooo good! i'm sure it's going to catch up on me though, oh well. we should do a 24 marathon sometime ;)

bali photos

2006-06-02T10:34:00.000+08:00

Click here

a few things on the mind...

2006-06-01T21:57:00.000+08:00

maybe it's just post-holiday syndrome that when you come back to your life and look at it and think I'd rather be somewhere else, doing something else... yeah it's prob just post-holiday and def post-bali…

it was BEAUTIFUL! I have pics somewhere... sorry i can't put a link on here to show you a glimpse of what it was like. i can send an email :) but anyway I don't think the pics do it justice, the smells, sounds, people, food and feelings makes it something different. for me, a few of my fav things were

- the towels in the villas, they smelt good and were thick and really soft,
- playing with the frangipanis, they smelt even better
- sleeping in double-queen sized beds with fat pillows all to myself!
- waking up and putting swimmers on (reminded me of our fiji trip!)
- having poached eggs (nearly) every morning

and yes of course the wedding! jaime looked gorgeous and her dress was soooo beautiful, Tim has an older brother so I actually have 2 brother-in-laws (that works right?) they're very english and proper, hehe I love it! I think the hardest thing for me was not having any of my friends there… it’s different meeting new people and getting to know them, and everyone else had someone. Funny I got asked a lot if I had a boyfy or where he was… ha it was a bit of a joke as now Jaime has an Englishman, sarah’s boyfy is English and so where’s my Englishman??

Anyway it was nice to be able to get away for a bit and escape responsibility and expectations of work and so on. But now I’m back and the holiday feels like a distant memory, it’s straight back into it and somehow I feel less energetic, somewhat apathetic towards what I’m doing. Had a talk to the boss today and lots of stuff is happening and the next 12months will be huge, which is cool. I just can’t seem to get excited about it. Don’t know why… and then mention of pay came up and it turns out that there’s no increase in salary or anything even though he knows I deserve to be paid more, but can’t afford to do so. Which I’m bummed about but also quite adamant to not let it get to me, as I know it’s just money and I don’t want that to be the reason behind what I do. But still have that niggly feeling about it all… worse of I’m not sure what everyone else is getting paid and so don’t feel like I can go about demanding a raise. Sigh I know God knows what I deserve and I went into this job acknowledging the fact that God knows how much I can handle financially and if I am faithful with the little things he will entrust me with more. I don’t want my worth to be justified by man, or money or things that I do, cuz I know to God I’m worth more than that… but is that enough? hmm I dunno

Ahh and then another thing is that an incredibly close friend from high school asked about working in our company. I’m really in two minds about this and have no idea what to do/say. It could go really well or really bad, thing is she would be really good we have similar work styles and get on super well. But don’t want it to effect our relationship. I know some people feel strongly that you shouldn’t work with friends/family and others say just give it a go… I really need to pray about this…

Anyway I’m trying to plan my next holiday… you always need something to look forward to and Vietnam is next on the list… I really can’t wait, but I know I have too.

dude! where's your blog?!

2006-05-04T00:26:00.000+08:00

ohmigosh just realised that it's nearly been three months since i've posted anything haha and we were saying in the early days that I'd be one of the ones who'd blog regularly... hmm

well i'll begin with the ramblings of a one-year old, because today just happens to be my one-year birthday at Fluid (has it been that long?!) yep sure has... no one actually realised at the office until later in the day/evening... i think my boss was a little upset he had forgotten this special day, but he'll get over it i'm sure ha but seriously i never would have imagined things would have happened this way or how things would have turned out. God's been amazing in providing this job, something that i enjoy (most of the time heh) and allowing me to grow and mature in other areas. and for me what i do, my work and where i am in the workplace is important as i know God is using me here as part of my ministry.

it was so cool the other day having lunch with a colleague and sharing about God and our beliefs and thoughts. she's been going to a chinese church and has started going to a bible study group, which is great! a few days later i received an email from her asking me to help her pray for her niece who is in ICU back in Canada with some virus that the doctors don't know much about. I know God gives us opportunities like this to share his love, comfort and peace and wrote back an email prayer and encouraged her with some scripture. i know this is just the beginning...

i've been reading a book about God's manifestation and hiddenness (thanks dpma) which is really good for where I am at now. so many times we rely on the tangible, obvious things from God to base our relationship and faith in, however so much more of the time is spent when God draws back and asks us to seek him first in all things, regardless of the outcome or what he can do for us. our faith and confidence should lie in christ alone. and that's something i've been learning more about recently

over easter weekend, a group of 23 of us from our church went to Beijing baby (woharr!) on a missions trip... it was quite a different trip mainly that we couldn't blantly share the gospel or speak of Jesus, God or christianity on the streets, but despite that we did have awesome conversations with people as they are so open and hungry for the truth.

a quick overview: we trained overnight (bunk beds and squat toilets with handles so you don't fall in) to inner mongolia to a high school, the classes had 48-60 students which in itself is amazing and we basically shared our life stories, songs and photos and taught the classes. we went back to the students homes for meals and they were so generous with what they have, i felt so blessed! we trained back that night to beijing and spent some time at the universities and talking with the students, who focus mainly on getting a good education, to get a good job and so on. But there's more than that! through the english corners at cafes we got to share that with them very cool. on sunday some of our team were part of a easter celebration service with an international church there, doing dramas and dance. the rest of us were supporting up in the balcony. it's crazy to think that in these churches that are government approved only allow foreign passport holders to come to the services! seriously we are so priviledged to be able to worship and serve our God so freely, something that's so easily forgotten. the next day we headed out to an orphanage which was incredibly special. it was a special needs place, so children from state government orphanages with physical, mental, physcological needs came here. they were from a few months to six years old and all i kept sayign and thinking was "precious" that these children are so precious in God's eyes, that even tho their parents might not accept them or want them, they are loved. and it was amazing just to be with them and see them enjoy the simple things like blowing bubbles and stickers and playing with balloons. we headed back to hkg the next day and even on the plane, God reminded us what we are about, and placed us around the plane among the other people. One of the team, Cherie was sitting next to a teacher who had taken a group of HK highschool students on a cultural exchange trip and they were involved in a bus accident the day earlier. some had been admitted and released to fly back with the rest and a few were in critical condition and were still in the hospital. But our GOd is an amazing God and we were able to pray with the teacher and the students on the plane for God's love and comfort. there were lots of tears and questionning looks from other passengers, and i know God was doing something there and again it was awesome to be apart of his plan.

for myself, the trip was definitely humbling, just knowing that God will use us in everyday sort of situations and that we need to be ready and available for this. how many times do we let opportunities pass us by, because we're caught up with our own thoughts, desires and are preoccupied with our lives? too many if any. the trip also has given me a glimpse of God's love for his people there and i actually really liked the place and know i'll be back... only God knows when :)

wow k this post nearly makes up for the lack of updates... nearly heh

other stuff that's happened... i got a digi finally, so will start posting some pics, planetshakers came to hk - they were awesome, looked after my boss' crazy cats - they hate me (the cats), lost season 2, rugby sevens - booo lost in the semis, dove is back - wohoo and saz is back in june!

and I'm going to BALI soon for my sister's wedding, i'm so excited, i just can't hide it... !! having a few dresses made, just cuz i can it'll be so much fun and a week on the beach is definitely what i need :)

ohmigosh my sister's getting married, i'm going to have a brother in law!

2006-02-19T20:04:00.000+08:00

boat party - Neenz & Anna

2006-02-19T20:01:00.001+08:00

hey, don't touch Dan there!

2006-02-19T20:01:00.000+08:00

boat party - Carmi & Andrea

2006-02-19T20:00:00.000+08:00

aerobics 80s style

2006-02-19T19:59:00.000+08:00

The AMAZING HK RACE - Dan & Steph "planning"

2006-02-19T19:58:00.000+08:00

80s guys

2006-02-19T19:57:00.001+08:00

80s rock HK style... scary

2006-02-19T19:57:00.000+08:00

storytime in the lounge

2006-02-19T19:56:00.002+08:00

hmm s'mores

2006-02-19T19:56:00.001+08:00

wah what a beautiful cake - thanks mum!

2006-02-19T19:56:00.000+08:00

ohh my party!

shoes + more

2006-02-19T19:12:00.000+08:00

ahh yes I did finally buy those shoes :) sorry nam and whoever may be interested, don't have a digi so will have to take a pic some other time... well if my time was under 2hours then yes I would have a digi now hah... although I ended up doing a little more shopping than expected, i.e. i came home with a few new purchases including two jackets, a top and a pair of jeans... oh well!

not sure whether the chinese ointment did better, I couldn't really tell, as my right leg was more sore in the first place! aiya...

the good thing is that I back to having coffee again... hmm coffee, although I think I've been so deprived over the past few weeks that I'm trying to make up for it and have been having at least 2 a day (espressos as well!) ahhh and yes there were a few empty bottles of wine at the Au's the other night too... hmmm

anyways just going through my photos from the crazy kiwi trip here and have posted a few for yas :) enjoy

2:12:53

2006-02-13T22:31:00.000+08:00

hmm just numbers but they meant a lot on sunday morning after waking up at at 5:30am to get ready to join 40,000 people in tst for the HK standard chartered race - full, half-marathon and the 10km...

sigh... i'm somewhat disappointed with that time, but i guess i can't complain as i really didn't train for this one and i did beat my previous time by a few minutes... a few minutes, what a difference that makes.

pre-race - i was so consumed with the time factor and setting high expectations for myself that when we started i actually forgot to start my timer, and then at the first water station i noticed my stop watch had stopped! argh so I reset it to find out it stopped again later... so crazy! i guess it was God's way of telling me, don't worry about the time or anything, just enjoy it... so i ran and kept running. i had several goals for this run, 1. to finish, 2. to run the whole way, 3. to beat my time, 4. not to get on the loser bus ha i guess i can tick them all off and another incentive was that if i beat my previous time, i get to go buy these shoes i like! can't wait :)

race - the best was targeting people on the race and matching their pace. for the first 5ks there was a guy wearing s tshirt that said "head of the pack" so i imagined myself as the "pack" and followed him... that was kinda fun. i lost him after the first water station but just kept running. the funniest thing was when i finished, this random guy comes up, says hi and mentioned that he followed MY pace for 15kms! how crazy...

post-race - i'm sore as... why do we do this to ourselves? good thing i took the day off work today, as i've been hobbling around the place and man, steps are real killers! especially going down them!! ahh will try avoid them for a while

and i'm doing a little experiment... i've massaged some menthol cream stuff on my right leg and some chinese ointment on my left hah let's see which one feels better in the morning! any bets?

it's back to some form of normality this week as we have on the menu: work, masterlife, lunch dates, a swim sometime, dinner dates, a movie perhaps... and so i continue to run that race called life :)

dear Aunt Donnave

2006-01-31T20:36:00.000+08:00

I FINALLY got to meet Aunt Donnave and Ryan today! Yes THE Aunt Donnave, Abbey's precious aunt and so many of ours now hah I think we've all adopted her - as every one needs an 'Aunt Donnave'!

It was so special being able to meet them as it was like having a little bit of Abbey here too... if she was here that would have made it even more better! (btw when are you coming Abbey?!?) We all met at the Lamma ferry pier, and I could pick them out straight away as they were trying to find the ticket counter, so I kinda followed them, but not to seem like a stalker I just waited around the corner hah...

I was equally as excited to meet them as I was to go to Lamma, as I had never been before! crazy, since I've lived here for how long?! After a 25min or so boat ride we arrived and were suppose to meet some fo Ryan's friends, but there must have been some miscommunication as they weren't at that pier. Which turned out fine as we trekked up the paved hill and saw the beautiful sites of the mountains and trees, beaches and the power station. yes, it's Hong Kong and there's a huge powerstation with 3 big chimney stacks puffing out smoke into the beautiful blue sky... sigh

Our journey was motivated by the fact we had heard there was a little place called "Bookworm" that had amazing cheesecake! An hour and a half later, with the midday sun scorching down on us, we end up at the other pier to find only seafood restaurants and no cheesecake place :( I think we quickly got over the fact when we sat down to eat and ordered lobsters! YUMMMM!! I can't even remember the last time I had them, so that was a treat. Thanks Aunt Donnave!

Even more of treat was seeing John Snelgrove (our pastor at the Vine) and the family, along with some others from church, Karen, Mark and his dad... it was SOOO crazy! That's typical HK, where even though there are 7million people, you still manage to bump into people you know!

The best was when we were on the way to get an ice cream, we (meaning Aunt Donnave and I) saw these bags and yes we made a beeline for them and started ohhing and ahhing over them! I definitely know she's related to Abbey now! hah they were so cute we both had to buy one teehee... I love it!

Back on the 'mainland' we stopped off for coffee... and now I've been taking a break from coffee/tea/alcohol for the past few weeks (2.5 to be exact) so I can keep hydrated and train better for my run... BUT it's not every day that Aunt Donnave and Ryan are in town and that you have a chance to have a coffee with them. AND SO I couldn't miss this God-given opportunity, (who knows when I'll have another chance!) and pretty much downed a tall latte right there... sigh... it was good :) although now I'm paying for it ahhhh

What a great way to end the holidays! It was such a blessing to be able to meet more of the Abt family, they are so amazing and loving although their Texan accents makes me miss Abbey more! They're on their way to Guangzhou now, pray for safe travels!

hmmm... whose coming to HK next???

godiva & jay chow

2006-01-28T10:54:00.000+08:00

I had a moment last night... my boss gave each of us a box of godiva chocos for chinese new year and I've been having moments with them (like we did in auckland :P) and I just got some jaychow songs from a workmate and last night while I was waiting for a friend, I was standing in central listening to one of my fav songs of his eating godiva... it was a happy moment :)

I'm really excited about today, for several reasons -
1. i got to sleep in
2. i don't have to go to work
3. it's the beginning of chinese new year (a 4 day holiday)
4. i don't have any plans to do or anywhere to be
5. i'm still in my pajamas
6. it's raining - perfect for a day inside with movies and books

yep that's my day, it's good to just do nothing for a while, I've been listening to one of tom's songs (our worship leader at church) and it keeps going on in my head "i will be still, I will be still..." which in hk it's hard to do and but it's soooo important.

anyway happy chinese new year! :)

does God like sausages?

2006-01-16T14:13:00.000+08:00

this morning...

me: mummm, you put sausages in my sandwich (in my best whiny voice)
mum: hmm it's chicken franks
me: but i don't like sausageeessss
mum: just eat it, bless God
me: (huh??) how does that bless God? I bet he doesn't even like sausages anyway!

well, here I am, blessing God by eating my (yuck) sausage sandwich...

special

2006-01-06T20:26:00.000+08:00

wow it's been a year since I made this blog known to the world... and so how far have I come since then? sigh.. miles... a different country, a different occupation, a different church, different friends, different lifestyle. and yes it is my birthday today, so it's a different age. It has been a really nice day, and I feel very special. I have been feeling as such for the past few weeks, with friends coming from all over the world, purposely fitting a trip in their travels to visit me - it's somewhat overwhelming to think that you actually mean that much to someone and in this case 8 someones :) thankyou

and earlier this week there was a gathering to celebrate my life (and it's continued journey) with various friends from different areas and times of my life coming together and the common element for them being there was me. I still can't get over that fact that people came because of me, who am I to be given that respect or love and yet they willingly gave their time and energy to be with me. I don't think I've really had something that has been so focused on me and usually I tend to shy from that sort of attention and so I go full circle, I feel very special and very blessed, thank you

going back to today, when I arrived at work, my desk was covered with beautiful fragrant flowers of all colours, balloons decorated my chair and I even had brownies for breakfast! My co-workers are amazing and put on a bbq for lunch with homemade patties, salads galore and a yummy chocolate cake. you can never go wrong with chocolate cake :) and to top it all off I was given a nano with an blue armband (to match our office colours) so I can run with! They all know I'm 'training' for my run in feb, ha

I have also received calls and messages from very dear people in my life, thank you for making my day a special one.

something I was thinking about the other day and of course today, is now that I'm 24, am I happy with where I'm at and what I'm doing and what I've done? I guess there's so much to analyse and sometimes that is not a good thing to dwell on too much, and yet it's always good to think about. and yes, I am happy, I love what I'm doing and the place I'm in. I know God has me here for this time and it's right. I just can't wait for what's to come, as it only gets better :)

so here's to the new year and another notch on the belt :)

TONG. Kristy Tong

2005-11-28T19:15:00.000+08:00

You scored as James Bond, Agent 007. James Bond is MI6's best agent, a suave, sophisticated super spy with charm, cunning, and a license's to kill. He doesn't care about rules or regulations and somewhat amoral. He does care about saving humanity though, as well as the beautiful women who fill his world. Bond has expensive tastes, a wide knowledge of many subjects, and his usually armed with a clever gadget and an appropriate one-liner.

James Bond, Agent 007

67%

Maximus

63%

Batman, the Dark Knight

58%

The Amazing Spider-Man

58%

William Wallace

54%

Indiana Jones

50%

Lara Croft

50%

Captain Jack Sparrow

50%

Neo, the "One"

46%

The Terminator

42%

El Zorro

33%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

I chose to be...

2005-11-14T18:46:00.000+08:00

I think it was in a sermon sometime last year, I can't remember who spoke or the exact words they said, but one thing I do remember is that they said, we decide what we are - happy/sad, angry/joyful, grateful/bitter and so on. It's a choice. And for me I was learning to be more mature in my emotions (still learning)... and so I decided that I chose to be love, committed, present, real, positive and pure. And from the past few days, I have decided to add another one - be passionate.

The Planetshakers conference was awesome, it actually was a first for me to be a fulltime delegate, I have only served at previous conferences, so it was really good to receive from this one. Everything - the worship, speakers and people we met, was full of passion, passion for Jesus Christ! It was full on and you could see it in their faces and by the way they spoke that they truly are passionate about the God they serve. Can I honestly say that?

I guess being brought up in a Christian family, I've been happy to go along just doing what I've always done; being a good christian, going to church, fellowshipping with friends etc. But that's not what it's all about, there's more.

I want to be SO passionate about Christ, that people will see and want to know His love as well, that it'll be so attractive that it'll draw people closer to Him, that God will be glorified in everything and every thought (ha that is a hard one). I know I can't do it, being just a human, but I know through God's spirit He will help me, and every day is a new one. It's just up to me to make that decision, the decision to be passionate!

oh what a day

2005-11-04T11:04:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting in dozo, a nice japanese place on the corner with the view of the escalators... great place to people watch and also be watched, hmm now that's a scary thought!

anyways, the day started bad and then got a little worse and then horribly bad!!! had another cry in the office and Simon joked saying this is a 4-month thing - me having a cry in the office haa... but he added that it was good to let things out ha had a wee chat and he's so funny, cuz he started to get all teary-eyed hehe... and even the guy next to me was all concerned etc. ahh the power of a few tears, but it's so funny cuz crying is sooo unattractive with the runny nose and blotchy face etc... but I guess there's something about people expressing their emotions in this way that makes you break

sigh... so that's why I'm having japanese, my comfort food and so the day continues...

"kristy needs..."

2005-10-25T20:05:00.000+08:00

ok since some of you guys are doing this, thought I'd try and google the title:

Kristy needs
a nap right now
to write more happy poems on her website
me for something
to get used to the idea
the help of the Baby-sitters Club
15 hours in the dental chair
to know what is a good time for the committee to meet
us now more than ever
to make an agenda for the next meeting
all the help she can get
to write more

I like the first one!! hahaa funny I used to think I was so cool having the same name as a Baby-sitters Club, good thing I got over that

"You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests"

2005-10-23T10:08:00.000+08:00

As the beloved of my heavenly Father, "I can walk in the valley of darkness: no evil will I fear." As the Beloved, I can "cure the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, cast out devils." Having "received without charge," I can "give without charge." As the Beloved, I can confront, console, admonish, and encourage without fear of rejection or need for affirmation. As the Beloved, I can suffer persecution without desire for revenge and receive priase without using it as a proof of my goodness. As the Beloved, I can be tortured and killed without ever having to doubt that the love that is given to me is stronger than death. As the Beloved, I am free to live and give life, free also to die while giving life.
"The Return of the Prodigal Son" - Henri J.M. Nouwen

I know this, I can say it... but do I live like what God's beloved should? This book was recommended to me a while back and it's taken a while to pick it up. I'm only on the third chapter and the truth is portrayed so simply and matter of factly I had to stop and write it down. So many people are like the prodigal son, myself included; wanting to take what we can and go out on our own, trying to find love, acceptance, a sense of worth when really we have rejected the only place that we can receive it all, in our Father's place. Not so much in the physical, but in the spirit and our minds.

I relate a little too well to what the author writes, "I am so afraid of being disliked, blamed, put aside, passed over, ignored, persecuted, and killed, that I am constantly developing strategies to defend myself and hereby assure myself the love I think I need and deserve." And in that like the prodigal son, I've been moving away from my Father's home and chosing to live in another distant country...

sigh... I just want to be home where I am called Beloved.

just love it

2005-10-15T07:16:00.000+08:00

Check this out - Dance, white boy, dance

hhaha it's good to know I'm not the only one who has solo dance parties in my room haha! It would be so embarassing if someone caught it on tape though!

it's about time

2005-10-12T18:06:00.000+08:00

that I wrote another blog... I was starting to get spam in my comments! crazy

and yes it is crazy how time just flies by... it's
1 month till I've been a graduate for a year
2 months till december, end of the year
2 months that I've had this cough
3 months till I left NZ and been in HK a year
3 months till another birthday
5 months till the half marathon
5 months till B&Chris are parents!!!
6 months that I've been working
8 months till Jaime&Tim's wedding!!!

some things are rather exciting (baby & wedding), others half looking forward to (the run, I really need to start training!) and rest just fills in the gaps

Stuff has been going on, work as usual with this promo SoHoctober which is fun as friends are involved, but also slightly stressful and that's another story

Heading to Planetshakers in KL in a couple of weeks, so am excited about that, more so that I can get some time off and have a get away, quite frankly I would just love to go to a beach for a week... pretend it's Fiji baby, hey it's nearly a year since I was there

ok this will all for now, will try and update a bit more regularly, otherwise will just email/text/call :)

being domesticated

2005-09-17T19:19:00.000+08:00

I just washed my hair and used this sebastian shampoo and it smells so yummy...

well I'm home this morning, as I'm going to work later to set up for tomorrow. so as you do when you're at home on sat. morning, you put on your swimmers and do the house work to french music! ha so far I have swept up the leaves outside, watered the plants and of course my feet, done some washing, wiped down the floor with those cool wipey things, straightened the kitchen chairs...

the rubbish is piling up and that's one thing I really don't like doing - taking out the rubbish! no reason really, I just don't like it... I haven't done it for a week and I figured that dad would be back soon I'd leave it for him, but they're still away for another week... hmmm I think I'll just have to do it - DO IT

ha that's one reason I don't want to live on my own, so someone else can take out the trash hehe in my 3 years of flatting I probably only took it out not more than 10 times! everyone else seemed like they enjoyed it so I didn't want to take that away! ha

hmm I'm liking this french music... makes me feel like I'm on holiday there. hmm maybe one day when Jaime&Tim get their holiday home over there (or was it Italy?) I don't mind really :)

I think I'll make some slice now...

pinch or two of salt... or a bucket ha

2005-09-16T10:57:00.000+08:00

yes well I have somewhat recovered from the events of last week... hmm i think i get rather emotional about things, when it really shouldn't take that much of our time & energy. there are more important things in life...

...like family - I just spoke to dad whose in Malaysia with mum. He was suppose to be back on Wed, but then didn't come back - I was the one calling home to see if he was back and waiting up at night! ha... now it looks like they're both away for the next week. I'll survive :)

...like coffee! omg we just got one of those espresso machines at work with those coffee packs and all you have to do is push the button :) hmm love it!

...like enjoying the sunshine, today is sooooo beautiful! blue skies and sun, just wish I was by the beach

...like work, ok I have to put this in cuz there are some exciting things happening September in SoHo and Nat & James are playing so that's going to be good! ha I'm sitting in a cafe having lunch and the home page for the internet here is our Venue Alliance website!! haha... I think my boss has been here :P the magazine on my left - HK Mag has an editorial piece on the Sept in SoHo event telling people to go to it and another little mag called Urban Soul has an advert of ours :)

... like holidays, which monday is and I'm looking forward to it as I have to work on Sunday (sept in soho event), I know... but I'll find some way to make up for it

...like having a pilot friend called Henry who has just been to NZ and did some shopping for me :) I can't wait to have a triple chocolate cookie time cookie, mainland camebert... and I can't remember what else was on the list! ohhhaa fun

mehh

2005-09-08T19:10:00.000+08:00

ok i don't even want to write about this now cuz i've gone over it so many times and i still can't understand why it happened. basically a client called my boss today to complain about me, saying that i was rude and she was not impressed with our service. and when my boss asked her to come to our office to sort it out, she said she didn't want to see me! mehh.. that hurts. everyone keeps saying (myself included) not to take it personally but it's hard not to esp. if something like that is said about you!

good thing my boss doesn't believe her and has sorted it all out... but I still have that horrible feeling that i've done something wrong. i know i haven't, and my boss has already told me that i haven't so i shouldn't worry about it. but of course me being me I will and i do get all emotionally caught up in it all. mehhh i still have to deal with them as they are our clients and i'm somewhat dreading the next meeting with them ahh i have a horrible fear that she will come up and slap me! ha... of course that wouldn't happen, but the idea that someone actually thinks that of me really upsets me. i don't know what to do or how i can make it better. i guess we can't always be on the good side of everyone , there will always be someone who will be rubbed up the wrong way or the other way around. i think it would be different if she said it straight to me, i might be able to handle it better(?) or maybe not. but the fact she called my boss does make it worse.

i just had to escape the office and went to visit another client who just opened a spa&salon. it's so beautiful there, calm and relaxing... and they are so nice and they love what we've done for them. why can't all clients be like that? i'm so much more willing to do extra things for them... although it's easier to do this, it's not really the right attitude. yes i know, i need to be christ-like towards people, even when it's hard. obviously it's easy to be nice to someone who is nice to you, but so much more if you are nice to someone who isn't so nice. ha, nicely put don't you think?

sigh... anyways i've had a cry about it so i really shouldn't waste anymore energy or tears on this issue. it's done, deal with it, face the next day with a smile and extra makeup. just love it

going to stomp tomorrow which will be a nice treat, that and an extra bar of chocolate on the side thanks

Phase 3?

2005-09-04T19:56:00.000+08:00

At the moment my parents are away and I'm all alone. I've realised that I don't think I can live on my own... I don't really like the idea of coming home to an empty place. I like the idea of having people around, but this quiet time has given me some time to think about stuff. Mainly personal management in terms of time, finances and life in general.

I've been in HK 7.5 months now (wow it's been THAT long already?!) I'm pretty much settled now at home, a good church & 180, friends, work and so on...

Work is work, and that's all it is ever going to be. I've been there for 4 months now and things are becoming more routine. Although now I've been converted to a mac user - I have seen the light haa... have a read of the 2nd article on our website

Church is alive and well. Cliff&Linnet's wedding over the weekend was so beautiful, I'll have to try and get some pics :) I think now is the time for me to focus on where I'm to be ministrying within the church and start sowing into it. more to come...

School friends, church friends, work friends, new friends - they are a plenty. And yes I still get the "Are you chinese?" question :) I'm also getting called "kris" which is kinda nice, as previously only my family & close friends called me that...

and yes I still do miss NZ & Dunedin life and grass :P Just looked at some pics - beautiful wish you were here!

All in all, God is good and I know that I'm here for such as time as this

and on the seventh day God rested

2005-08-14T18:57:00.000+08:00

I had a facial today
I bought a 'mini' tshirt
I ate doufu fa
I walked into a shop and walked out 10mimns later wearing a new outfit
I made slice
I watched Lost
I drank earl grey

k it sounds like a rather selfish day... it's all about me! I guess we do need days like that, to do things we like and that make us happy. Although I was challenged last night by a speaker at 180 about the time we spend praying for others... for me, the lack of more so! That's something I need to develop in my prayer life

Sorry for the lack of communicado in general, it's been pretty full on at work. I'm going to talk less about work as I'm there so much and constantly thinking about it. My boss is away for 2 weeks, I'm 'managing' the office and I've just had a 63hr week.

Overwhelming? yes
Stressful? yes
Tears? most definitely

The first day my boss was away, I read in my daily light "I want you to be without care" and it jumped out at me and I've been saying that and remembering that every time I start to worry about stuff. It's awesome that God wants us to just give everything to him and not worry about stuff, put things into perspective and look at the bigger picture.

yes, the bigger picture something I always forget!

The Talk

2005-07-31T10:52:00.000+08:00

The past week I have thinking about the fact that my 3 months probation is coming and what's going to happen. I had that terrible feeling (fear) that my boss had forgotten and he's going away for 2 weeks, so we could only talk when he gets back. But yesterday he sent an email and said we should go for a coffee and talk about my performance etc.

so the talk... well as usual he likes talking so he did most of it. Overall he's happy with what I've been doing and how things are going, which is great and discussed some of my weaknesses and how I can improve on them. Also about where I want to be going in terms of my career and areas I'm interested in developing, main thing is language and there's opportunities to go into China! so that's exciting!

I'm just so amazed at how God has organised and planned this all! With my job and a great boss who loves affirming with words (I totally need that!) empowering me to take the part of the business I'm managing and make it my baby (me the control freak), encouraging me to be confident in what I'm doing and not look down on my abilities (fears and insecurities) - it's all been taken care of. Even financially, everyone would like to be paid more, and when I started God knew exactly how much I needed and if I was faithful with it He promised to increase it... and now 3 months later I've received a pay rise :) Awesome ay

And now, with this all there is more responsibilities, more opportunities and really a time when I need to focus on what's important and where I should be directing my time and energy. And we talked about life and making sure there's a balance in what we do, so that's really good to know his thoughts on that.

A few verses I was reading this week on the way to work confirm this all as well...

Daniel 10:12
Then he said to me, “Do not fear, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart to understand, and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard; and I have come because of your words.

Jeremiah 1:7-8
“ Do not say, ‘I am a youth,’
For you shall go to all to whom I send you,
And whatever I command you, you shall speak.
Do not be afraid of their faces,
For I am with you to deliver you,” says the LORD.

Ecclesiastes 3 - A time for everything :9-15
What profit has the worker from that in which he labors? I have seen the God-given task with which the sons of men are to be occupied. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.

I know that nothing is better for them than to rejoice, and to do good in their lives, and also that every man should eat and drink and enjoy the good of all his labor—it is the gift of God.
I know that whatever God does, it shall be forever. Nothing can be added to it, and nothing taken from it. God does it, that men should fear before Him. That which is has already been, and what is to be has already been; and God requires an account of what is past.

2005-07-27T23:21:00.000+08:00

Some of the lovely ladies I've met (left-right) Suki, Mandy and Gabby

2005-07-27T23:19:00.000+08:00

Just found a pic on the church website - our "Amazing Grace" team! We ran around HK dressed like that!

DO IT!

2005-07-24T19:10:00.000+08:00

Dove has got me saying that now "Do it, do it"... and if you've seen Starsky & Hutch then you know what I mean ha

For the pass couple of days, even weeks there have been a few things going on, and I keep going over them in my mind and I know what I should do, but don't do them... either I think about it so much that I think I've actually done it, or I keep procrastinating and putting it off and it gets demoted down the to do list.

An email and a talk with Lyds this week pushed some buttons and as always she is full of amazing wisdom and encouragement, I just love talking to her. Honestly I have to think more objectively about things and try to remove the emotional element which is always involved. Not saying that its a bad thing, but sometimes it does effect your judgement and thinking...

And the speakers this weekend both at 180 and morning church were entirely relevant to me and where I'm at. One being on purity and that our purity is what effects how intimate we are with God and the other asked the question "Where are you?" from God's perspective. He's looking for us, waiting for us... why do we busy ourselves with the things around us, when all He wants is for us to look up and smile at Him?!

There's some stuff I need to deal with and these lyrics sum it up quite nicely...

How could someone so beautiful
Feel something for me
Hold me and love me and touch me again
And show me why I believe

That the first time I see your face
Everything else around me will fade to the background
and I'll be struck, full, by the truth in your gaze
As you work an indelible change in me

All I have and all I am and all I think and do
Can find its purpose and meaning and life only in you

- Indelible, Brooke Fraser

3:44am

2005-07-21T23:45:00.000+08:00

I just got home from Dove's... crazy night/morning of laughs and catching up - love it.

ah I have work tomorrow, so better jet to bed

we can't always plan

2005-07-18T18:20:00.000+08:00

One thing I find frustrating is having your day planned and sorted and you've prepared everything so you can do what needs to be done within the time you've given it... and then something or someone comes along and disrupts it all and throws everything out of whack! I guess I get so set on things that when they don't go according to plan then it's like, now what?

Anyways, Dove is back in town and was suppose to see her last nite, but couldn't and then we were planning to see her tonite, but that didn't happen... and she's only here for a week! We're all working during the day and she's busy sorting out stuff anyway and everyones tired at night so that just sucks :( At least I don't have to tape Lost tonite! hah

Work was kinda crazy but fun today... I'm getting to know some of the venues pretty well and they always offer me drinks and to sit and chat hah :) yeah I'm "working" but I guess it is part of what I'm suppose to do, get to know the people, build relationships and so on. It's funny how knowledge and understanding effects how you think and perceive things... particularly with people. The more you know, the more you understand and can relate to them. So that's good...

Got asked that "are you chinese?" question again today... all in a days work :)

somewhat obssessed

2005-07-10T19:43:00.000+08:00

...with work. Perhaps. The past week I've been leaving work at 8:30, 9ish, 10:30pm... There is lots of stuff going on and I actually like being at work. Maybe because it gives me a focus, something to do, a sense of worth & importance even. I dunno. Or maybe I'm just trying to 'busy' myself so that I don't have time to do anything else... other things that I should really be doing, committing to, spending time on/with. hmmm here's our new internal newsletter some of us put together Fluid Newsletter Funny :)

...with earl grey tea. I'm lovin it and have at least a cup or two a day. I find it rather calming and helps to clear the mind. So that's good

...with shoes. I bought another pair today, and last week I bought two pairs on the same day, one pair before work and one pair after! Do I really need them? Well now that's debatable

...with Lost. The tv series that's started recently here, hadn't heard of it before (I'm a bit slow with these things) but it's the only tv I watch each week, so I guess that's ok. Although it is getting rather cheesy

2005-07-06T22:36:00.000+08:00

working hard

a common question

2005-07-03T17:17:00.000+08:00

Seriously there's a question that I get asked at least once a week and it goes something like this...

Other person: Are you chinese?
Me: yes
Other person: you don't look chinese
Me: I know, I get that a lot

Well I guess the up side of that is that it usually means I'm meeting someone new and if it's every week then that's a lot of people! either that or people just have very short term memories! hahaa the only thing is that no one ever says what they think I look like!

Carmi aka mavis

2005-07-01T15:21:00.000+08:00

Had the greatest talk with Carmi this morning!!! well by the time I woke up and sorted myself out it was lunch... but that's ok it's a holiday :)

Carmi & I been through so much over the past few years, starting from the Chile missions trip... we REALLY had to get to know each other as we shared a room for 3 weeks & then a tent for 2 more! You seriously get to KNOW someone when you spend that much time with them, esp Carmi's random habits like sleeping talking in three different languages and my crazy morning antics haha... we also got to learn a lot about our personales espacio hmmm

Then we were in the same lifegroup, accountability partners, prayer buddies, tennis partners (that one time!) and not to mention a certain club we had haha good times. And she's never failed to listen, offer advice, pray, speak words of encouragement and tell me how much she loves me... and I know I don't say it enough, but thankyou Carmi for always being there, you are a true blessing from God and I'm soooo happy that you're only a phone call away :) love you Carmi, honestly I do

WOHOOWHOOOHHOOWOO

2005-06-27T05:33:00.000+08:00

MY SISTER IS GETTING MARRIED!!! I'M SO EXCITED I CAN'T HELP BUT WRITE IN CAPS! WOOHOOOOO... I ACTUALLY STARTED CLAPPING MY HANDS WHEN I FOUND OUT "IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, CLAP YOUR HANDS" haha

ok I have calmed down from the excitement a little, I can't wait to hear how he proposed... hmmm... so when's the wedding? I dunno, that's k cuz she's getting married and whenever is good. This is the first marriage out of us, I guess since there's only 3 of us, 2 which have boyfys, and now one that's engaged! hah we used to always joke who would get married first... and Jaime always said it wouldn't be her BUT IT IS! haha

This is the highlight of the year and it's even better cuz her fiancee Tim is such a great guy and he's so perfect for her, so that makes me happy!

(happy) sigh... :)

ten minutes is clearly not enough

2005-06-26T15:53:00.000+08:00

Jacinta's word at 180 last night was definitely a word in season for me as Abbey e-mailed and said pretty much the same thing to me! Basically just doing a spot check with God and where we are at with him. So many times we can continue doing things the way we've always done them (cuz they worked) and not realise that it isn't what God wants for us now, so we need to regularly tune ourselves to Him.

Personally coming back to that place where I can know and feel His presence and just BE with him. I don't have to do anything, say anything, bring anything... all He wants is me just as I am. And for that I thank God for his loving grace, cuz honestly I'm not worthy.

When I was younger I used to think that when your heartbeat was in sync with someone, or if your timing of your breath was the same, or your walk and stride were in step it meant you had a special connection with that person. SO I used to always try and get in step with my parents when I walked alongside them, or when I was sitting close to them I would try and control my breathing to be that of theirs... and it should be the same with God. I just want to be so close that I can feel His heartbeat and breathing and align myself with His so we can have that special connection.

It's such a conscious thing and I know so many times I try and rush ahead, or lag behind putting me out of sync with Him (esp being in HK) and all He's asking is "be still and know I am God"

breath in...

breath out...

in the middle of the night

2005-06-25T09:11:00.000+08:00

I started texting Abbey cuz I missed her and I'm so excited that she's going off to Rome today to meet Lyds&Em!! And I just couldn't sleep so picked up my guitar... omg it's been sooo long, I can't even remember when I played last. Poor neglected thing. I realised how much I love it haa and was remembering all these random songs like this one for my sister's birthday and I woke her up singing it to her...

Sarah so many years have pasted us by
Sarah you're twenty-one already
oh what a great age to be
you can buy your own tv
sarah my sister sarah

Sarah so many years have pasted us by
Sarah you're twenty-one already
and I will keep our memories
in my heart for eternity
sarah my sister sarah

haa it's so cheesy, I love it. Finally went to sleep cuz my wrist was sore, it's been sore most of the week... maybe from carrying an umbrella hmmm

I'm working at home today, which is nice for a change... so I'm giving myself little breaks like going into the kitchen for something, hmm might do some baking later yumm slice

Alright get back to work, oh wait gotta hang the clothes first

running on empty

2005-06-23T18:32:00.000+08:00

physically and definitely spiritually...

Last week my body decided to give me a wake up call and suddenly I was in heaps of pain. Ironically I was in a shop's changing room at the time and just had to half sit/lie in the small cubicle. Neens happened to call and was trying to comfort me and telling me to stretch etc. ha looking back it is kinda amusing, half dressed me on the phone, lying on the floor, going mehhhh and in pain... after being kicked out the shop (they were closing) I had to stop and sit on the side of the road before I eventually made it to 7-11 to get some drugs&water. The lady behind the counter kept saying "ho tung ah...(very painful?)" Yes was my pitiful reply and I hung off the counter for awhile... not a fun night

I realised I had been neglecting my health as I "adjusted" to this new lifestyle... my main meal of the day was lunch which usually is a sandwich, and in the morning it's only a piece of fruit, and hardly anything at night cuz I don't like eating before bed (9:30-10pm by the time I get home) no snacking either... SO that's obviously not very good. This is one area I definitely need to manage a bit better, proper meals and stuff.

Now I'm feeling a bit sicky with a sore throat, headaches, blocked sinuses etc... booooo my boss was away for 5 days and the day he came back he texted me at night saying "I want to say again what a good job u have done! I dont like to see u getting sick today and u must take care of yourself. I meant what i said and have a sleep in tomorrow and a "wee" break if u need it!" He's great

On the spiritual side, I haven't been spending time with God, in His word or even in prayer. Those really cheap one-liners before I go to bed, or rush out the door don't really count. I mean if I'm not walking with God each day, what am I doing? where am I going? It's so easy to just keep doing the same thing (ha as I was writing those questions I looked at these stickers by our computer which says "Jesus is the only way" "One way to God" "U turn to God" "Walk with Jesus"... nice)

Last night as I was being kept awake by a mossie in my room, I started reading "Lord I want to be whole" by Stormie Omartin and there's lots of stuff I know I need to be dealing with from the past that is effecting life today... (it always seems like we deal with the same things!) so just started praying about that. I know I've been so self absorbed lately and the best way to get around that is to pray for others. So that was 5am...

hmm... so God same time, same place?

2005-06-15T21:52:00.000+08:00

Fluid girls (left to right) Wah Wah, Jacky, Sally, Me & Helen

summertime and the livin is easy

2005-06-11T20:59:00.000+08:00

I guess it can be most of the time, but when you're in HK for summer, it's HOT and it ain't that easy... it's barely even the begining, I don't know how I'm going to hold up? Just pretend it's Fiji baby... hmm I'm trying, so today I wore my swimmers the whole day, I went out without makeup (just to go get a facial), had a mango drink, wore flip flops and sunnies, put on insect repellant... I think that was my extent of living a Fiji life. The rest was just crazy!

Was suppose to go to a Hawaiian pool party tonite (just to end the day right), but while I was preparing for my kiddie's Splash class, I heard something break in the kitchen. I kinda poke my head around the door and saw glass on the floor and then BLOOD! OMG there was so much! My mum had accidently dropped a glass on her foot, and honestly there was blood everywhere! So quickly trying to remember my CSLA classes - RICE! So put her foot up, cloth and compression on the wound, grab some ice and blood is still going everywhere... so crazy. I've always wondered what I'd be like in an 'emergency'... I probably know what to do more than I think I do, cuz I kept saying "I don't know what to do" but did everything that was suppose to be done... and I kept making silly jokes to mum and myself like, blood is suppose to stay in our bodies not come out mum! eww gross mum your blood is EVERYWHERE! Where's that CSI blood detector spray stuff? and I've just cleaned the floor!! yeah I was just getting grossed out by the cut... and ewwww gross blood... (weird, it made me think of Queen's St flat when we had slugs in the kitchen and I'd squat down and look at them and just say eww gross... steph had to take them outside)

To top things off, we were having people over for dinner and they arrived to see me with gloves and a bucket cleaning blood off the floor, chair, table... and mum lying on the ground with her foot wrapped up leaning on a box!! ha bit of a sight... good that mum called a nurse friend of hers and checked how we should be doing things. The worse thing is that we don't even have a first aid kit in the house!! Not even the basics... so crazy, will have to be a bit more prepared next time!

So yes, this past week has been full on! I guess the longer I'm there, the more responsibility I have and more things I'll be doing!One thing I do love about this job is that I can be creative as well - like in helping the designers with projects, and coming up with tag lines and ideas. that's fun. I've also done my first intro presentation to a client, which I will be doing more of, so will have to get used to doing that! I've had several meetings on my own, which went fine... it's good when I get feedback from my boss on what to do and how to improve... and I've eaten lots of chocolate cake! We always seem to have cake in the office!

Coming up... on Monday Jamie & I have to go to a "Search Engine Seminar" oh what fun... and it's at 8am! crazy... we were saying we'll go for the breakfast and then sneak out while the people are talking, only after we call our boss to wake him up and let him know what he's missing haha

Tuesday I'm planning to go hear Whence He Came so that should be good...

Wednesday nite races - we went last week, but I didn't win anything, although Neena & Higgie did. The horses are sooo amazing! We go check them out before we place a bet... they get paraded around in the pit area and then the jockeys come out all dressed up, it's kinda exciting! Neens, after a taste of success wants to go back... she can't stop thinking about it! ha funny.

And of course sat. is Derek&Janice's wedding... and Herb's&James' party is that day/night too so will be able to go to both! umm really should ask for a day off first ay...

2005-06-06T22:06:00.000+08:00

Bob - the Fluid cat

a sneak peak into my past

2005-06-06T05:50:00.000+08:00

My mum found an old box of mine outside in the storage place! It’s been so crazy looking through my stuff from over 10 years ago, the memories, smiles and laughs they brought back was just like it was yesterday – cliché, but true! I can even remember wearing those clothes, and what was happening during those times, just being able to re-live those situations. I guess sometimes that can be good, others not. Was reading through a diary from ’93-96, high school years, I really can’t believe life was like that! Mostly about who was with who, who liked who, what happened on the weekend etc. And for a lot of the time I was really sad, depressed (or thought I was), it was a rather negative, lonely time – but we never want to remember the bad things, only the good, but so much of it makes us who we are today. hmm

Anyways, here’s a few excerpts from my past -

1992 – Poetry
The Man Inventor (that's not even a typo)
A mad inventor lived above me,
He asked me to come to his house for tea,
The cookies tasted bad,
The inventor went mad
I walked out the door,
When he crashed through the floor.
I ran down the stairs,
To find that he was dead.
Now there’s no inventor up the stairs.

School Reports – ha have I changed much??

Summer, 1990
Kristy needs to become more confident in her own ability.
She’s looked upon as a mediator and unbiased in the disagreements which occasionally occur in her friendship groups.

1990-91
She is quite shy and reserved…
She works well as a member of a group as she prefers to communicate within a smaller unit.
She has excellent powers of concentration and is able to read silently for a prolonged period.
She works with great delicacy and care…
She is a quiet, sensible and extremely hardworking girl. She always sets herself the highest standards in all she does.

July 1, 1992
She likes to speak in small groups or in a one to one situation.
She enjoys the challenge of making something out of junk…
She is well balanced and sensible and can always be trusted.

Achievements
Swimming 5m (I actually have the badge!!) and I did go up to 1000m, Grade 4 in ASA-ESSA Water Skills award, and Personal Survival Grade 4 - I didn’t even remember I had these!

Other items in my collection include movie stubs - Some didn’t have dates, so just put them as they were in order:
1994: Speed, What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, The Specialist…
1995: Time Cop, Legends of the Fall (11 Mar & 12 Mar – yes it’s that good), Nell, Outbreak, Boys on the Side, Pocahontas, Batman Forever, Waterworld, Tank Girl, French Kiss, Crimson Tide, Assassins, Murder in the First, Seven (27 Dec), The Cure (28 Dec), Nine Months (29 Dec) – must have been bored during those hols!
1996: Dangerous Minds, Ace Ventura-when nature calls (12:40pm & 5:55pm on the same day! – don’t ask), Babe, The American President, Jumanji, Sense & Sensibility, The Birdcage, Primal Fear (Richard Gere), MI, The Juror, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Independence Day, The Rock, Jane Eyre, Courage Under Fire, The Frighteners, Sleepers…
1997: Jerry Maguire, Shine, Star Wars, Scream, The Fifth Element, Romeo&Juliet, The Lost World, Batman & Robin, Hercules, Men in Black, Speed 2, Face Off, Mr Bean, The Jackel…
1998: I know what you did last summer, Titanic, Replacement Killers, Full Monty, Alien Resurrection, Good Will Hunting, Spice World, The Man in the Iron Mask, A Life less Ordinary, Godzilla, Sliding Doors, Mulan, Armageddon, X-File, Rush Hour, Wedding Singer…
1999: Episode 1, Gen-X-Cops, Tarzan, Mask of Zorro, Enemy of the State, Mod Squad,
2000: Toy Story, Three Kings, American Beauty, Skulls, Shaft, Payback, The Story of Us, The Faculty, Shanghai Noon, The Patriot, Chicken Run, Sixth Sense, Deep Blue Sea, Keeping the Faith, Gen-Y-Cops, Anna & the King, Autumn in New York, Romeo Must Die, Where the Heart Is, Patch Adams, The Beach…
2001: What Women Want, Aaron Kwok Live on Stage, Vertical Limit, Vanilla Sky, MI:2…

ha.. where were you when you watched these??

"It was like this big button, and I pushed it!"

2005-06-05T12:06:00.000+08:00

I had a massage yesterday and it hurt! I can still feel the sore muscles now... but during it, no matter how much it hurt, you know it's good and to be able to just put up with the pain for the moment, you know you'll be better off. I'm trying to draw some parallels in life here... hmm

Sometimes you just need to push those buttons, climb those stairs, bake that cake, float that boat, flip that coin, walk that mile, sing that song, read that book, dial that number, wear those shoes... regardless of what you feel like doing and your fear of the outcome.

ok don't really know the reason behind this post, I'm tired and need a nap. yeah for sunday arvo

mi personales test

2005-06-01T19:22:00.000+08:00

Your #1 Match: ENFJ

The Giver

You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed.
Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections.
Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down.
You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine.

You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.

Your #2 Match: ENTJ

The Executive

You are a natural leader - with confidence and strength that inspires others.
Driven to succeed, you are always looking for ways to gain, power, knowledge, and expertise.
Sometimes you aren't the most considerate person, especially to those who are a bit slow.
You are not easily intimidated - and you have a commanding, awe-inspiring presence.

You would make a great CEO, entrepreneur, or consultant.

Your #3 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer

You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.
You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules.
Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.
You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller!

You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #4 Match: ESFJ

The Caregiver

You are sympathetic and caring, putting friends and family first.
A creature of habit, you prefer routines and have trouble with change.
You love being in groups - whether you're helping people or working on a project.
You are good at listening, laughing, and bringing out the best in people.

You would make a great nurse, social worker, or teacher.

Your #5 Match: INFJ

The Protector

You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity.
Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is.
You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience.
You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them.

You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.

What's Your Personality Type?

it's been one month...

2005-05-31T18:59:00.000+08:00

I originally was going to change lyrics to Barenaked Ladies for my current position of just finishing a month at Fluid... but nahhh can't be bothered

So yeah it's actually been a month! CRAZY... who would've known that I would be here, doing this and meeting the people I am? not I, said the fly. and yet I am. It's kewl though and I am enjoying it... it's pretty full on with the work, meetings, clients, promotions - one is starting tomorrow, so have to keep ontop of everything. crazycrazy... oh and I'm going to my first meeting this sat. by myself! ahh... I'm sure it'll be fine, amusing in fact... so that's sat.

Finally managed to catch up on blogs, woohoo everyone's been going all over the place and road-tripping. I miss that... just getting into a car and driving somewhere - not me driving of course, I'll forever be on my learners! ha... good times

One thing I'm looking forward to is teaching Splash this month, which is the 5-7yrs old at church!! they are sooo cute and i just love talking with them! my new friends :) ok is this my little way of trying to escape the realities of finding real friends and forming deeper relationships??? hah maybe

well last weekend was really good cuz I managed to spend some time with a friend from school, who is a Christian now and just TALK! so it was all in God's timing to bring her along then, she's back in the UK now. But I know that was just for then. At least I know... denial is the first stage of everything. and I'm over that ha

Today is my mummy's birthday. yeah for mummy!! I bought her some white chocolate, which she loves. I guess after a while presents aren't as special as being with someone - your presence... awwww

ok you win

2005-05-25T18:48:00.000+08:00

right yes I know it's been a while, the thing is that I haven't even wanted to blog. I know that's terrible. I guess it just makes it easier to keep things to yourself, your emotions, feelings and thoughts. Cuz once they're out then people know, like they KNOW and that's kinda scary. I dunno, sometimes I feel that I'm holding back a lot. There's a lot I could give, so what's stopping me? I dunno. Like since I've been back I feel like I'm more serious, more reserved, maybe even detached from people, not really ready to be myself. Well what people see is me, and that's what they know. But the real me, what's going on inside - do they know me? Do they even want to know? I guess in HK it's harder to really get to know someone, and let someone know you. It takes time. Something that a lot of people don't have, or aren't willing to give. And fair enough. People come and they go... what's the point in investing you time, emotions, and everything into something that isn't going to last? Is there a point? I think there is. How else are you going to learn, know and grow? We are social beings, we need to connect, to feel connected, be apart of something... so why aren't I?

I'm just a girl

2005-05-19T06:20:00.000+08:00

hah I can't believe some of you don't know what a sante bar is!! They're the best Whittakers chocolate for coffees - ever!

Anyways... after 2 weeks and one day at my job I CRIED AT WORK!! OMG how embarassing!! It was totally my fault though, cuz I did something soo wrong and when my boss found out he got mad and told me off, I tried not to cry, but he kinda kept going on about it cuz he didn't know what to do to fix it and it's an open plan office, so everyone heard, and I couldn't help but cry. Probably more so cuz I knew I had done something really bad, and so I felt even worse... mehh... although my boss felt really bad that he made me cry and kept saying sorry and got me tissues etc. wow, the power of tears! ha and today on our way to a meeting he apologised again and said he's rather blunt and straightforward with things, and rather let it out and let us know what he thinks instead of us worrying he's mad at us etc. He even asked if I actually like my job and everything. I know I'm totally over-sensitive about things like that, so I just need to toughen up and get use to the way he is and not take it so personally. mehh

Anyways it was all better that night by going for dinner with Abbie and Priscilla and sharing XTC (gelato), then crashing on another dinner with Nat, Nate, Derek and Janice (some interesting table topics/discussions) and THEN we watched STAR WARS EPISODE 3!! everyone was sooo excited, it was so funny. and the oldest Ma brother had a REAL light sabre, honestly it was the coolest thing ever and he actually put it on in the theatre, and everyone cheered! hah... but honestly it was really good - didn't quite appreciate the first two... but this one definately made up for it. Weird cuz now it's all over! The end of another trilogy, that's sad.

so that finished rather late and after hanging around and talking about it, headed back to Nat's place and to bed at 3am... up for 7:30am prayer at church! hah very impressed, cuz out of the 6 people, 5 of us had been to the movie and so didn't have much sleep. So crazy, but totally worth it!

Which makes me very tired now so it's bedtime for me...

oh and btw, if you haven't watched Star Wars Episode 3 yet - GO!

My upper room

2005-05-16T05:09:00.000+08:00

ok today was suppose to be my computer-free day... and I've been home the whole day! Yes it was hard, and about 7:20pm I went online... gee I did well. ha anyways my justification was that I'd be on it even later tomorrow nite after work, if I didn't go on now. Yes, nice little things we tell ourselves!

anyways, had a fun exploration around my building and realised that I can get up on my roof! I was so stoked... I took up a mat, my bible, journal, music, water, sun screen, sunnies, phone, books, snacks, pillows and a beach umbrella! hah it was great, although you can hear the roar of the traffic go by, it's exactly like the roof tops you imagine in the old days, where they dry things, hide (Rahab & the spies), pray, look at the stars (ha not in HK!) so yeah it's my new favourite place - my upper room.

lazy sunday morning

2005-05-15T09:40:00.000+08:00

Open my eyes, the curtains are drawn - what time is it? 9:55am...
maybe I should get up, or maybe not. Close my eyes

12:20pm - ok maybe I should get up now. Slip into my dressing gown, the place is so quiet. Everyone must be out. It's just me, smile, I like that.

Mosey on into the kitchen, the clocks ticking, the tiles are nice and cool... hmm yum there's mango, thanks I'll have one of them.

Thinking back to last nite, I don't know if I can do that again... just being out till morning in bars and clubs. It's fun and all hanging with school friends and checking out new places - but is that me? Do I really care about being in those places? no not really, if anything it's about the people, the friends and relationships - that's what I care about. So to be with them, do I have to do the things they do? Maybe to a certain extend, but never to a point where I have to compromise my faith and belief in Christ. I guess I always feel that by being there I can be a light to them, to share God's love - but do I really? God, Jesus or my beliefs rarely come up in conversation, talk is more of gossip and the old days. So am I just kidding myself? I dunno and either way I don't think I could sustain a lifestyle like this, work long hours, stay out all night, one that HK demands of young people - physically and mentally it's tiring, and spiritually I know I'm not in the place where I should be - are we ever?

Like Jesus did, I know I have to draw away from the crowds, to a quiet place to be in God's presence, to quieten my mind, soul and spirit to hear His voice - "Be still and know that I am God". It's so hard in a place like HK, but even in the midst of it all, God will bring that peace and lead me to the quiet streams to be refreshed.

On another note - today is Global Day of Prayer - people from all over the world is and will be praying and praising our God. That's awesome and I can't wait to go to the HK stadium (yes where the sevens are held) and be apart of it! woohoooo

Putting my feet up

2005-05-10T20:35:00.000+08:00

Seriously I never knew the extent of that until I did it! It feels sooooo good, esp after walking around the whole day in SoHo and Lan Kwai going to venues and talking to managers/staff, handing out my card, making sure the promo is going alright etc. It's interesting cuz some places are really into it and have heaps of positive feedback, in others there's little interest and they're not even using our coasters! aiya... Will go around later in the week to makes sure they are... it was pretty fun though, being amongst it all

ok so far in my first week I've:
- helped delivered coasters and stands to 58 venues, and taken pictures in SoHo, LKF and Wanchai (check out current campaign atVenue Alliance)
- help take my laptop to get fixed in Wanchai
- gone to four meetings with Simon (Wanchai, Taikoo, SoHox2)
- picked up a cheque in Happy Valley
- helped to take our end of year accounts to the accountants in TST
- drafted letters, replies, quotes, invoices and a press release
- sorted out a licence for trade promotion competitions for a client
- talked to SCMP and Apple Daily for advertising fees
- gone to buy toilet paper and paper towels
- changed the water several times
- put together my cabinet and another one, which has a drawer jammed
- read through the media agencies contact book and the public relations one
- sought out quotes for printing (still waiting to hear back grrr)
- put together a GANTT chart (time schedule) for the June campaign
- organised a courier for pick up and deliverly
- answered phones, hung up on people by accident
- gone through the Media magazine, finding potential contacts
- ordered stationery through Wahwah

Pending jobs...
- work on metatags with Jamie, for all our web sites
- source a waterproof wall clock for a client and a postcard rack
- go to the races tomorrow nite to see how the promo is going, take photos and take the courtesy bus back
- go to the Hofex exhibition on thursday
- get those quotes!
- write up a questionnaire to get feedback from clients of our services
- send out a press release for current promotion
- decide what to put in a package for the company to send out information, work with designers on that
- source metal work folders for staff
- contact/do a send out to all media agencies of our services
- put together a list of potential clients
- follow up on trade promotions licence, send it off and pick it up when it's ready
- make sure venues have enough promo items - so probably will go around again later this week

ok I think that's enough for now, I'm sure more will come along. I guess it's all good being busy and all, it gives me something to do and I admit I like multi-tasking. I guess I need to learn to prioritise and focus on what's important. The time we have is so valuable!

And besides work there's lots of other stuff I wanna be doing! Mel's in town till Sunday, so want to spend as much time with her as possible - so met up with her and Neens after work, shopping, eating and just got home a lil while ago...

Girls night at Amy's last nite was great! I really loved it and knew God was leading us during that time. And it gets me excited about what God is going to teach us and use us to encourage and support each other. Good thing it'll be fortnightly, a bit more manageable.

180 is such a blessing and just want to serve in any way, so this weekend I'm helping out with the food&beverage, which is always a favourite... hmm might be making ambrosia, a taste of NZ :) yummm
which reminds me there's 8am prayer meeting tomorrow, so better go to bed (dpma I will be there!!)

woah long blog - thanks for reading

a slice of heaven

2005-05-08T12:48:00.000+08:00

you know when you're having a really crappy day, esp when you feel bad and look even worse... you just can't be bothered with anything! yep, I even went out without any make-up on. I know! But in those days, little things happen that really make it so special. I mean it's even more special on those sort of days...

SO I woke up yesterday after a bad sleep, I was feeling guilty for sending a rude text in the middle of the night, sporting fresh new mozzie bites - on the face, even!, suffering from puffy eyes and sore throat... shall I continue?!?!

but my slices of heaven were -
1. speed shopping (before my cousins had to leave) and getting some bargins
2. being able to bless my cousin with some of my purchases
3. receiving a card from Abbey - she's so special!
4. moving back into my room!!!
5. receiving a call from GOUTY - it was sooo good speaking to him, it's been so long!

and then after a nap I went to 180 and on the way I was still feeling really crappy and tired and didn't feel like talking to anyone or being "uber"... and it was in the prayer meeting someone said something along the lines of "like no matter what happened this week, or today, or the things on our mind, God we give you this time, this night and ourselves so we can worship you and share your love" and "let us look beyond our own needs to that of others" and honestly it was like a wake up call to me, to just snap out of my oh-poor-me-i'm-so-tired-i-can't-be-bothered-with-this-all attitude! It's funny how our needs and problems become smaller when you look to others. I mean I know we shouldn't ignore our issues, but when you put them into perspective, seriously they aren't so big. So many people out there are facing things bigger than our own, so God I pray you'll help me to take my eyes off myself and look at how I can help and serve others who need you.

hmmm....

2005-05-06T21:46:00.000+08:00

ok I'm actually kinda tired, but wanted to blog just to clear my mind... yes it's a bit too late to go for a walk or a run. Maybe another day

So I've had my first week at work, it's gone surprisingly well and I've actually enjoyed it! funny that. I've been tagging along to the meetings Simon has with various clients, listening and learning the ropes as eventually I'll be doing that! It's pretty interesting. Although one muck up today was that I wrote a reply for him and he had checked it and gone through, and I retyped it and he sent it off. But then we realised it had all these spelling mistakes in it! ahh... feel so bad, but hopefully it's ok. mehhh

the funniest thing in the office is that we have a cat that comes in to hang out in the arvo. Her name's Bob hah and she loves sitting in one of the designer's chairs. So when he gets up to do something, she's straight in it and won't let him move her. She actually bit him and throws up a huge fuss! Soo funny, so everyone's trying to get her off the chair and one of the guys spins it around and around and the poor thing is holding on for dear life until it finally was spun off!! It was a bit of a laugh though haha

honestly I'm knacked and my allergies aren't making things easier, I can hardly see the screen mehhh I'm just going to bed. will do some catching up with my blog reading tomorrow so there better be some good stuff! haa

Day One

2005-05-03T20:33:00.000+08:00

well... firstly thanks to those who texted and left messages even if they were just after 12 last nite - not naming anyone Abbie and Joshua! I was actually still awake then so it wasn't too bad. I woke up super early, as you do - like 6:30am... I didn't have to be at work till 10am, so went back to sleep and thought about what I was going to do when I got up hahha... so got all smarted up and headed out, ready for my first day at work. woohooo

I stroll on up just a little before 10am to find that the office was closed and the gates were up! Hello?! where's everyone? Didn't want to feel like a keen-bean turning up before everyone else on the first day, so went for a walk and came back a few minutes later after seeing one of the ladies go by. Funny, cuz everyone rolls in 10:10, 10:15... even 10:30am... Simon, my boss comes in a bit later, and we sit outside and have a chat. Well mainly he does the talking, me the listening, nodding and ahuh-ing. He's really kewl, this is his baby, his passion and he loves what he does and the company. And wants us all to feel the same. I guess as you invest a lot of your time, self and energy into something you want everyone else to capture that passion and excitement too. So that's kewl.

Went along with two others to watch them change a billboard for a client (they do this at the beginning of the month). The first thing they ask is "how are you feeling? are you nervous?" hah they're soooo funny! so that was kewl to be able to talk to them a little

The rest of the morning (or what was left), was spent reading over some material, getting an idea of what we're offering- we're a design and marketing "agency", not "company"... so will have to remember that. Simon is going to do some role playing with me later to see how I talk and explain to clients what we're about - no it's not a sales pitch, just an introduction. He said it was a luxury having me come in, there's heaps of work and he wants to concentrate on developing the business. So like I said, he did a lot of the talking...

Had lunch with Neena & Mel... so exciting cuz Neenz just got a job with Walt Disney as a financial analyst!! Soooo exciting! Although now her office is in Causeway Bay (I'm in Central) so we can't do lunch boooo... it's only temp for 3months, but I'm excited for her nonetheless... had a free coffee with my stamps I collected so that was a bonus of the day!

In the arvo Wah Wah (Joanne) and I went around delivering coasters and coaster stands to various venues around SoHo and Lan Kwai Fong. It was soo crazy hot and we had to carry all this stuff!! We probably did about 3 trips in all... Wah Wah did all the talking, which was good, I stuffed it up when I tried! ha... it's kewl cuz we'll be working closely together and it was good to get to know her and also go to all the venues that we work with under Venue Alliance; which is a collaboration of restaurants, bars and stores in particular areas to promote and advertise corporations/businesses through campaigns, promotions and so on. We just coordinate it all. It's pretty kewl.

Four hours or so later, sweaty, thirsty, sore foot, hungry us returned back to homebase "the Fluid office" - it's 8:40pm. woaahh first day at work and OT already! Simon was great cuz he kept saying thanks and what a great job we did and if there was anything he could do to follow up (we were actually going to go back out to some places we missed) but he said to do it tomorrow... with the Wan Chai venues and that we could come in a little later. That's the way it works, have a late nite at the office, come in a little later. ok

SO some big stuff coming up in the next few months, Simon wants to train me up within the next 3 - he's going on a holiday in August and I need to be able to handle things by that time!! kinda scary, but should be ok.

Yeah it's BEDTIME!! I feel like a kid, after dinner, wash up and go to bed hahaa well it's another day at work tomorrow - THANK GOD it's Wednesday :)

End of day one.

the point of NO RETURN!

2005-05-02T17:38:00.000+08:00

like omg I'm actually starting work tomorrow ahh... but it's ok, I had a great day laxing out on a junk (boat) trip today which was soooo good! We had 2 boats to accomodate the 50 or so people, and heaps of food and drink, sun screen and people ready to have fun. Weather wise it was beaauti-ful a little cloudy, with some wind and sun so it's definately a recipe for a great day! and it was will have to grab some photos hmm

Crazy I'm not even prepared for tomorrow! I don't know what I'm wearing or anything, usually I would've tried my outfit out several times, with the shoes and sussed out everything. I just can't be bothered at the mo. It'll happen in the morning ha now I'm sunned and really tired... about to go to bed

We just had a guest leave (momentarily) and 3 more arriving today - two cousins and interestingly, the guy who introduced my parents to Christ all those years ago, is visiting for 2 weeks! very kewl

ok promise to post something tomorrow, I'm feeling like I'm still on the boat... wooahhh please let me off - maybe I should just lie down! mehhh

ok fine

2005-04-28T17:38:00.000+08:00

I'm wanting to live in an idealistic world, where the world and all that is in it makes me happy - I'm so setting myself up for disappointment. So, apparently the minimum paid holiday is 7days, booo and in HK to work 5.5days is the norm... sigh, God help me to see and know that I am capable of this and that you will go before me! I'm definately going to need you each day, I can't do it myself!!

not happy

2005-04-28T15:40:00.000+08:00

Just received my contract for my new job and was a little annoyed cuz my hours are 10-7:30pm Mon-Fri, and 10:30-2:30pm on Sat! He never mentioned working on Sat... but I guess its instead of 10-8pm. I SOOO would rather have my weekends free, so that didn't make me happy!

Another thing is that I apparently only get 7 days paid holiday!! Most people get at least 10-14days! And I really want to go to Em's wedding and take some time off when people visit... grr that's sooo annoying! Hopefully will be able to talk to him, maybe it's just for the probation 3 months. mehhhh

I'm going for a run

p pp p p p pppp p p pp p

2005-04-28T13:10:00.000+08:00

My theory is that if you say it enough it'll make you no want to go... yes I need to pee.

Soo I've been up since like 6:15am bit of a record for me at the moment. my motivation was 7:30am prayer the church and it was really kewl! It's really great to be able to spend time in prayer in God's presence with other people! awesome awesome, we had waffles and fruit after so that was a bonus!

After was able to catch up with the dpma man... I've always wondered what the "p" stands for? obviously it's not related to the title haha. hmm since my blogs are always about me, I'm starting to feel really self centred... let me tell you a little bit about Derek Ma-

He is American Chinese (made the mistake of calling him Canadian once!) mid twenties 26?, recently engaged to the lovely Janice and they're due to be married 18 June, he can groove to the music, awesome speaker, genuine kinda guy, with a heart so big for God and people, leader of 180 and is passionate about what he does, works at church, lives with his bro, Cliff (who also is engaged to be married in Sept)... they're very kewl brothers, I almost wish there was another one... almost! ha there actually is, an older one - he's already married. umm when I first met Derek, he nearly made me cry - see post 29 Jan I think, but we're still friends hah! One of the easiest guys to talk to as he is open, humbled and willing to listen and speak his mind. Comfortable with his surroundings and his place in Christ, it's always refreshing being around him and talking to him. Great encourager and speaks with wisdom... hmmm what else? Check out his site, top right of the page and have a look at the video! It's awesome ( I actually can't download it, but have seen clips of it!) - this almost sounds like a personals ad! sorry ladies, he's taken heh

ok I've had two coffees already today, and I really need to pee...ohaha I wish I could a photo up of my hair, it turned out... ok :) sometimes I like it more than others, but on the whole it's pretty fun! you'll just have to come visit to see it haha

Represent

2005-04-26T19:37:00.000+08:00

Went along to an ANZAC day thing at some peoples place... didn't even know them, but just tagged along with Nat. the funniest thing though was that out of like 15 people I was the ONLY KIWI!!! mehh I crashed an only-Aussie party!! I was on the phone when we walked in and someone passed me and then goes to another guy, "I just heard a kiwi accent!" (don't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing). They kept talking about the good old days in oz, old tv series and shows, music and bands and I really had no idea what they were going on about. Finally watched the Castle, remember seeing a copy of that in the castle st flat, but never watched it. very stereotypical so it was a bit of a laugh and other aussie stuff. I guess it was good to represent my nation as we did fight alongside them on those shores. I even wore my "I call New Zealand home" tshirt haha

I'm about to go be a "hair model" so I'm a bit wary, it could be good... or really really bad... so I might be wearing a hat for a wee while. Here's hoping

wish list

2005-04-24T20:42:00.000+08:00

a cuppa tea
cheese & crackers (mainland camerbert on cracked pepper vitawheat)
the codecracker

I miss my flat and my flatties :( being able to come home and talk about our days, the random things we did like dressing up for our themed dinners, going for drives at night and walks on the beach, doing the flat shop at random hours of the night, washing the mini and the other cars, sitting infront of the fire, listening to some jazz or classical, reading stories of Jeeves, listening to Dave play his cello, talking to Brent through the walls, smelling baking, having lammies with Steph and chats in bed, falling asleep on the couch, feeding the ducks, eating ice cream, our granny lounge...

didn't really feel like coming home tonight... but didn't really want to stay out either. Just sat and watched as my bus passed by... and another and another... it was a beautiful nite, couldn't see any stars, but the lights from the buildings lit up the sky instead ha... it's quite a different side of HK, even in the midst of 7mil people you can still feel so alone. But I know we're not! God said He'll never leave us nor forsake us, which is an awesome promise, one that I always hold on to, knowing that whether I'm in NZ or HK or someplace else, God is always with me.

and on that note I'm signing off - nite

avoiding the spotlight

2005-04-23T10:58:00.000+08:00

Right now I'm suppose to be writing my job description my boss wants to know what areas I want to get into... so far this is what's expected:

"I have a basic requirement for your job role such as you managing and supporting our marketing businesses i.e. Venue Alliance (www.venuealliance.com) and CoasterAds (www.coasterad.com) and I would also like you to deal with on-going Fluid Design and Marketing projects to help clients maximize their campaigns with us and also co-ordinate/project manage jobs and help the designs get content and information from the clients to help the designers do their work."

I keep getting these feelings of inadequacies as I think about my job... first of all I thought he'd come back to me saying they didn't want me anymore! And I've told so many people about it... I think that was a pride thing as well. But he hasn't said that and I know it'll be ok, but every so often I'm like can I do this? my boss seems to have a lot more faith in me, and is throwing me these different ideas and things for me to do now and I haven't even started yet! He suggested that I join some organisations in town, like the British Council so that'll be covering the PR stuff of what I'm suppose to be doing... but just thinking of going to these functions with top CEOs, business managers and execs, who are more experienced and then there's me, little me, young, who looks even younger (someone asked if I was 16 last week!)... what am I doing there?! meehhh

But I am reminded of 1 Tim 4:12 " Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe"

so that's awesome... when I remember it! just then I read that BC members are expected to give a talk/seminar to the other members - it freaked me out! I really can't stand public speaking... hah coming from a soon-to-be PR officer. geek. honestly, I actually can't stand everyone looking at me - focus on the finger, the finger is pointing over there. Even when I shared a testimony in church about the missions week, my hands were shaking, I didn't really know what I was saying - ha funny cuz no one seemed to notice. That's totally God though, in our weakness He is strong.

I really just need to deal with it, have a week off before I start to get prepared, spiritually, mentally... and I know I have to do some shopping... now that's not too bad.

I know you can be overwhelmed, and underwhelmed, but can you just be whelmed?

2005-04-17T07:58:00.000+08:00

Who knows?!

Anyways, I've been feeling rather OVERWHELMED lately... of what? Just life... ha it sounds so cliche. I mean I actually have a LIFE now hahaa... seriously though, with a job, a church, awesome friends, and stuff - I'm starting to let my roots dig down in this place, hmm maybe for another 15 years... or maybe not. I've been so used to doing nothing and having lots of mi tiempo, that now with everything thrown at me it got a little too much and maybe I got too excited about it all and tried to do everything. It's crazy I've hardly seen my parents, maybe that's just apart of it all. So I've got a few weeks to suss it out and refocus and prioritise stuff might spend time in my cave

Just realised it's been a week since I've blogged! so here are some highlights
- Wednesday luncheon with the girls at the Vine Centre - it's becoming a weekly thing, it's kewl to be able to catch up with people during the week, everyone gets so busy with stuff it's nice just to hang
- Dropping off some stuff at my new workplace... there are some crazy cats that hang around outside that are always fighting!!
- Hanging with Neena
- Taking Shiva on a quickie tour of HK in one night! So crazy, but we managed to go on every single form of transport here apart from a minibus!
- Making Jared's raspberry slice, thumbs up dude, everyone's loving it - I know I need more friends hah (funny Abbey made it this weekend as well!)
- Going down to the beach and witnessing 13 baptisms!! awesome awesome
- Being encouraged by Rick Heeren and workplace ministry yeah I'm excited about my new job!! I know God has placed me there wooahooo

ok my mum's actually telling me to go to bed!! and she said she won't wake me up in the morning... hmm I guess that's what you get for living at home

A collection of... random stuff

2005-04-11T16:10:00.000+08:00

Random #1
On the way home tonight the guy sitting next to me was sleeping and he kept falling on me! It was so crazy, so I kept moving the other way, so I was half in the aisle... he even started snoring! haha... it was amusing though, and got me thinking about mi personale espacio and how much I enjoy my space. I guess another way to see it, is if I wasn't there he could have hurt himself quite terribly, so that's no fun

Random #2
At lunch today, was chatting to some ladies in the office and they're so cute, they're really excited about my new job! hah... and they've somehow managed to rope me into making a pavalova because I'm leaving! Apparently it's in exchange for something, I dunno, it's going to be a surprise hmm...

Random #3
Last night I was planning to have a quiet one at home, but then realised my mum was speaking at church (now how did that slip my mind?!) but it was really kewl seeing my mum up there and sharing what's on her heart and stories about her three little girls - hey wait she's talking about me!! Never had that happen before haha it was funny though, I actually laughed out LOUD

Random #4
Yesterday as I was walking out of church, who do I see?!! MALCOLM! OMG it was so crazy, and surreal, but hello, he was there. It was like mixing up my NZ life and HK life, those things only happen in dreams... well apparently not! He's here for a week with his fiancee (she's sooo lovely!) and they just happen to be staying with some of her friends from Oz that go to the same church. Small world ay

Random #5
We had gone out for Amy's bday lunch with her parents and realised this other guy went to the same school as me, although he is a few years younger we managed to find out who we knew and so on. And it was kewl talking about KGV life and our loyalties with Upsdell (our house, which I was the girls captain of, but he didn't even know that... boooo that's ok he's a guy)

Random #6
Phil called! ok it wasn't completely random, since we had arranged a time, but that was nice... oh speaking of calls, got one from Davina when I was at work and typical her was just sitting on the toilet (she won't mind me sharing this)!! hah cracks me up, the fact that you can be so comfortable with someone, there's nothing really to hide even when you're over in LA. loveya dove!

ahh... random stuff - it's like finding out you still have some chocolate in the fridge!! It makes my day

an after thought

2005-04-09T09:05:00.000+08:00

Funny thing was after I was offered the job, I was in such a stink mood!! Like bleh, I wasn't totally over the moon about the offer - I knew I was going to get it, I had the peace already even before and in the interviews - but had sucha niggly feeling that day. And so had a quiet time and talked to God about it and what I realised is that a job isn't going to satisfy me, nor provide me the things I need, nor give me a purpose for life... it's JUST a job! the ONLY thing that will EVER fulfil me, give me life and is my reason for why I'm here is Jesus Christ. Honestly, it was a huge revelation, because I've been so penned up on getting a job, and thought that only then will I be worth something, be of value, can make a difference, be an influence... but no, we are called to do that regardless of our job situation, any situation. We are called to live a higher life! So once I realised that, I started getting excited about the job, cuz I know God has placed me there for a reason and in whatever we do we do it for the Lord.

Nothing is worse than a nasty cup of coffee

2005-04-07T05:38:00.000+08:00

ok there is, and that's TWO CUPS! Yes I had two really na-sty coffees today, urgh... those instant ones with everything in it already, and powdered creamier. gross... ha whoever said life is too short for depressos is SOOO true!

Anyways... it's been one of those days when I wish I was back in NZ, mainly so I could close my eyes and walk home at night down North Rd. mehh... so couldn't do that here! I'd bump into people and things and there's always cars and people around, I just want it all to be quiet... shhh shhh

That's what I loved about living in the valley, so that I could have those times alone to think, or just clear my mind... it's so hard doing that here. You're constantly surrounded by people talking on their phones really loudly, or phones ringing, cars honking and roaring by, or even in the buses, the roadshow tv screen blares on... there is no escape! ahhhh

Yesterday we went out for a hike in Sai Kung and to a beach... and it was sooo nice just falling asleep on the beach with the sound of the waves and the feel of sand between your toes. hmm let's pretend it's Fiji baby

so yes there is a lot on my mind at the moment, nothing in particular, and yet everything at the same time

sigh... I think the whole idea that my life can change at any moment now is actually scaring me. Am I ready? I thought I was, but now part of me is wanting to hold back, it's not the best, but at least I know what it's like. The uncertainty of the future and what it holds. ha why am I always like this? Like what? Like the way I am... how many times have I been through this, to yet go through it again and again? Is my faith that weak? Don't I trust God enough to know He always has the best for me and promises a future of hope and blessing? I guess the reason we continue to go through times like these is to take our eyes off the world and the finite life it offers, build up our faith, and draw us closer to the one who does promise us good things. It's just that when we're in those situations it's never that obvious.

ok, I just need to get over it... so I got a job offer today, I have a few days to think about it and will have to get back to them early next week. I'm thinking I'll take it, ok yes, I will. woohooo I got a job! shh, I haven't even told them yet ha

My friends

2005-04-04T05:14:00.000+08:00

I love how you have special things with friends, just between the two of you that no one else shares. It's great and I guess you end up taking pieces of them with you and they do the same. And in the end, a lot of who you are can be seen in the friends and people around you... if you get what I mean.

Basically what attracts you to someone is some sort of common thread/element, something you both can relate to... and from there on you begin to realise more things about them, qualities you admire, respect, and desire in your own life. But I guess there are also areas we want to help and encourage each other in, to stand by and be strong when they need you and knowing that they will be strong for you. And that's the greatest thing about friends, that you can be who you are with, with no fear of being looked down on, laughed, judged, ridiculed...

I love it in A Knight's Tale when the King says to Heath Ledger (forgot his character's name) "Your men love you, if I didn't know anything else about you, that would be enough" and the same goes with friends.

In the past few days, I've shared some special times with my friends...
going to the hairdressers for a hair wash, buying the same shoes, long distance phonecalls, seeing old friends who I haven't seen in over 3years!, receiving encouraging texts, laughs over crazy movies, sitting outside at nite talking, catching up over lunches, chatting online to people in NZ, OZ & Singapore...

ahh love my friends, it would be kewl for all of them to meet... maybe one day haha yeah at my wedding!

I feel like singing a song... lalalaaa

2005-04-01T16:20:00.000+08:00

It's been a really kewl week...

When I get up in the morning I know what I'm doing, there's a routine... although I'm slowly slipping from it! haha I was so good and woke up early, and got ready, made my lunch... then gradually over the four days I've actually been at work, I've gotten up later and stopped eating breakfast, skipped lunch (ok I fasted), taken the later buses... haha it probably progressively gets worse towards the end of the week! lovin it... the office is really nice, so I can get all dressed up corporate style. I'm quickly running out of tops, so might have to do some quick shopping. The work itself is soooo boring... I have to go through old newspapers and find companies and then look up their details online and put them in a database. I think once I've done that, I have to call them to check their details... oh what funnn

Just bought a top which says "pretending it's saturday" I can't wait to wear it!

oh I'm quite excited about this other company I had an interview with. Well, scared aswell, cuz I'd be expected to do all this stuff and have responsibilities and I'm kinda getting used to doing things my way... "I did it myyyy wayy" ahh old songs. He gave me a wee assignment to do, so I've just emailed my ideas and will hear back probably next week. It's a small company around 8-10ppl and so it's definately a place where you could make a difference, unlike those big MNC who are so rigid, bureaucratic, but who knows?! hmm yes God does... will be praying

anyways, speaking of ingrown hairs hahaa (or lack of, cuz now I've shaved) I really should start running ... tomorrow :) I've been hula-hooping at home which is kewl (the 2 times I did it) but I went on for like 15mins w/o stopping! good for the abs I tell ya (no 1cm there!!)

Which book of the Bible are you? brought to you by Quizilla

goodbye 1cm(+)

2005-03-30T04:43:00.000+08:00

haha I have to mention this, my incentive for getting a job was that I couldn't shave my legs until I got one... and now I've got one (even though it's temporary... it still counts) so I shaved this morning :) it feels sooooo much nicer!

yesyes I'm going to bed now

a quickie

2005-03-30T04:32:00.000+08:00

my head is really sore and so is my throat and my nose hasn't stopped running... my first day at work and I couldn't really call in sick on my first day, so went... it wasn't fun. I had a wee stack of tissues and at lunch I went and got some drugs. mehh...

so yeah work... it was ok, nothing very exciting really, just going through newspapers finding companies and looking for their details and putting them into a database. thank God it's only for a month! Although it's a nice wee office, only 6 others and we had chocolate cake (yummmmy) cuz it was the boss' birthday.

I only have to work half day tomorrow, cuz I've got an interview in the arvo, and in between will prob go across the street to church and have a wee nap :)

alright I wanna go to bed now and it's just after 8:30pm ha

simply AMAZING

2005-03-26T19:38:00.000+08:00

We have an AMAZING loving God! So many things I can testify in my life and in the lives of the people around me that are examples of this!!

Yesterday a group of us from church went to Chung King Mansion to serve the people there. Ok to paint a wee picture of this place: it’s a 5 block building, 17 floors high, with shops, restaurants on the first two floors and residential, office and cheap backpackers/motels/rooms in the rest of it. There are little lifts which you can only squeeze 7-8 people inside, and windy stairwells all over the place. Many parts are poorly lit and there isn’t much natural light. The people in this area are mainly immigrants, refugees, travellers, business owners and so you can imagine the mix of different languages, clothing, colours and smells that permeate the building! Honestly it’s simply AMAZING. There is a history of drugs, addicts, dealers, murders, rapes, crime, rats, filth… which is associated with this place – much of which has improved or been dealt with, but you can imagine the spiritual oppression over the whole place. Like I said in the previous blog, I’ve always been scared of this place - I wouldn’t even go in to the money exchange with Jared! But God is so gracious and He allowed me to go on this outreach to overcome that and open my eyes to the life and His love for the people there.

We started with a prayer walk going to each floor or every other floor praying and painting the walls with God’s light (several people on the team had pictures or words for this, which was kewl), we talked and prayed with people as we felt lead. We went up to the roof and it was AMAZING just looking down these grated covered areas, which let light down to the small rooms/apartments below. The darkness and filth was evident, but I know God will use these to pour out His light into these people’s lives and rain down His spirit to wash away the dirt and everything (physically and spiritually).

We then had a worship time in the ICM room… it was filled with people from all over, Nepalese, South Asians, Africans, Chinese… it was so beautiful to hear our voices lifted up together as one to worship our King! You could feel God’s presence fill the room. It was like those church house meetings you hear about, so many people packed into a small room and everyone is just worshiping God. It’s something we rarely experience… it was honestly AMAZING! After, someone from the team shared about Christ and what he did for us, and a meal was served. The women go to another room next door where there is a children’s area and a medic room (some doctors and nurses volunteer there and someone donates medicine). I was so honoured to be able to lead a Bible study with some of the ladies and talk and pray with them. A 14-year old girl from the Congo didn’t speak much English, but she listened to us talk about our identity in Christ and she prayed in French at the end which was so beautiful. God let the people from different tribes and tongues worship you! And it was great to be able to do that

God’s grace and glory didn’t just stop then (it never does) and that evening my mum and I went to a worship night at church, where a visiting violinist ministered through his music. I honestly just love violin music, there’s just something about it that pulls at your heart/emotions, and you get all tingly! Again, God always comes when His children worship Him. The spirit of healing was so heavy and my mum was touched and healed of a back pain, which has effected her walking and causes her so much pain for the past 5-6years. And now she is free from that! She doesn’t walk with a limp nor has any pain!! Our God is an AMAZING God! Glory to God! On our way home we had to celebrate and go get some chocolate haha…

For this Easter weekend, the words of Amazing Grace have continued to speak to me… Amazing Grace how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me, I once was lost, but now I am found, was blind, but now I see. Thankyou God that you sent your Son to die for us, that you loved us SO much to pay the price for our sins. Thankyou for the cross and life you have given us through Christ Jesus, one that gives us hope and a future. And I pray we will continue to worship you and love you all our days. Amen

Whose next?

2005-03-24T19:50:00.000+08:00

Abbey's got a job, Sam's got a job... and now I've got a job! :) God's so good to us!

Although it's just a temp job doing data entry at a recruitment firm, it'll be a good way to ease myself into the working life, getting up early, having responsibilities and so on. It's a really nice office, so that'll be good. And even more exciting, I bought my first suit the other day!! woohoo, it's a classic slim fit cut, and of course black. My mum said that if I want to work in the corporate world, then I have to start dressing like I am. Which suits me just fine (hah nice pun)

Another thing that is kinda exciting is next week I have an interview with a Design&Marketing company, well more so in this other section of the company which does complete advertising/marketing for restaurants/bars located in a particular area like Soho, LanKwai, TST, Wanchai... so that could be interesting.

This weekend is going to be really exciting!! We're doing all these outreaches into the city- working with InnerCity Missions in Chung King Mansion, which is a place I've always been scared of for no particular reason, but am going in with the team on Friday to do a prayer walk, serve lunch, meet people and help out with a Bible study... I know good things will come from it, God will be in the house, so it'll be very kewl. There's lots of other stuff going on, like visiting an old folks home, an outreach in a mall, worship nites, Easter service and so on.

I guess the thing with running programs and organising things, is that sometimes we tend to let that get in the way of what God wants to do... we have to be careful not to let boundaries limit our amazing God!! ha coming from a perfectionist/detailist I know I have to allow God just to do His thing, even if it might 'mess' up things, cuz it's all about Him... good thing to remember

Anyways...

2005-03-23T12:09:00.000+08:00

My flatmate last year picked up on the fact I say that A LOT, funny... now I notice when other people write it, there really shouldn't be an 's' but oh well

So I guess you might be wondering how it went last nite, it was... interesting. It was smaller than what I expected, only about 20 people. I felt very young and inexperienced, slightly out of place and really didn't know if I would fit in with them. They talked about the mentoring program they run, which does sound good. Pairing up an experienced business/professional with a younger protege to guide them through their careers/personal lives. I don't know if it's for me though. It would be awesome and the benefits definately outweigh the costs. I'll have to pray/think about it...

I guess I'm just a little skeptical about these sort of things, assocations and stuff - basically the meetings are all hyped up and you easily buy-in to it. Maybe I'm just being stubborn or letting fear get in the way. Fear of what? Uncertainty, the unknown, maybe. I dunno

My sister left this morning, which after made me really sad. I hardly saw her or spent much time with her... and don't know when I'll see her next. She and her boyfy, Pat gave me the Jack Johnson cd and a jazz collection one yeah! That made me happy, and I had a latte this morning (of course after an interview - just a temp job) and just had a flake... a few of my favourite things yummmm

But despite all those good things I'm still feeling bleeh... I have a headache, I was sick last night which wasn't fun, my shoulders are tight and I really just wanna curl up and go to sleep mehhh but the day isn't over yet

Nothing quite like it

2005-03-21T11:10:00.000+08:00

The HK sevens I mean...

Absolutely crazy, honestly you'd have to experience it for yourself! Most of the time is spent watching the crowd, checking out the costumes, laughing at crazy antics of people, meeting&talking to people, bumping into old friends, drinking Pims (that's the sevens drink, besides beer), random singing, seeing pie sellers, having the same conversation with drunk people, people milling around all over the streets after, oh yes and of course watching the rugby!! haa... it was quite surreal, it was lots of fun though

I knew people in the HK team, so ended up supporting them heaps more... 3 guys from my school and a guy I used to work with. SO that was really exciting, sad they didn't do better but oh well... we ended up sitting near the England 10s team and they were pretty fun and the US team came and sat in the stands (I know, US plays rugby!).

The weekend's gone by so fast, it's back to reality now... the 9th week

getting a lil excited

2005-03-18T07:03:00.000+08:00

woOHooHhooo it's the sevens today/this weekend... I managed to get a ticket from Anna's dad at half the price, God's so good yeah! SO that's going to be very kewl, haven't been in ages

My mum is SOoo funny... she's been meeting all these random rugby teams around town and she goes up to them and says hi and asks them where they're from. She even got pictures with some of the NZ team (some really cute guys) and even invited a kiwi player (playing for Japan) back to our house for dinner! haha... cracks me up haha funny mummy

This morning I met the pastor of the church I've been going to (The Vine). He has a background in marketing and was a member of the Institute of Marketing in HK... so has some good contacts. It was just kewl talking to him, he's very laid back, easy going and chatting away. He was saying that we need people in the marketplace, to market the gospel, be God's PR and so on. Awesome. And he prayed for me at the end which was encouraging. He talked about HK being a strategic place, like a gateway for China and internationally. And so I know God has placed me here for a reason, so that's why I'm here

Funny, cuz I was thinking last night about stuff, as you do and realised more and more how God has been preparing and creating me specifically for His purpose - firstly I'm His child, a Christian; then I'm a female; thirdly, I'm ethnically Chinese; and I'm passionate about business. SOOO that makes me a Christian, Chinese businesswoman :) I'm working on each of those areas to make myself more effective for Christ... as a Christian-my relationship with God, fellowship with others, as a Chinese-my language, business-finding a job, a woman-shopping! hahaa

ohhaa... something I'm a little nervous/apprehensive about is tuesday nite... I'm going to a HK Association of Business & Professional Women function. Talk about networking! The lady I spoke to even suggested to get business cards done so I can hand out (they're currently being printed). I'm seeing it as an investment, of my time/money/self and in all investments there are risks... so I just need to go in, be confident, talk to as many people as I can and hand out my cards. Not so hard aye. Be strong and courageous ... It should be good, only thing now is what am I going to wear?! haha

Oh and I was a really good girl over the past week, so was going to go get that bag... but I came across some shoes instead and got them haha maybe next week

continuous consumption

2005-03-16T12:00:00.000+08:00

mehh... everyone's been getting at me for eating so much chocolate! Honestly, I don't think I do... really. Or am I in denial?! hah okok prob I do (funny I actually just wrote don't - Freudian slip?!) the other day I just ate a Flake for lunch. I know that's terrible!! I really need to start taking care of myself, it's so easy to slack off and get lazy, hence no running or other sports... in saying that I'm actually going to make some slice soon haha maybe tomorrow...

Refering back to the alliterated title of continuous consumption... I guess that's life. And esp. in HK, it is a materialistic, self-gratifying, consumer focussed, driven by the desire to succeed sort of place. And it's so easy to get caught up in it all. Everything that's surrounding us is taken in and excreted in some way or another. What we hear, see, read, eat... we internalise it and it effects our behaviour, thoughts, emotions, relationships and so on. As a marketer (aren't we all?) this action of consuming is relied on and it's powerful and can be dangerous. I guess the only thing we can control is what we are consuming... what are we feeding our minds, bodies, and spirits?

Full house

2005-03-14T03:51:00.000+08:00

At the moment we have five extra people staying at our place... they're here for a week! mehh I don't know how I'm going to deal with it all, I love being around people, but God knows I need my space!! I need to find some time to escape, esp. for my quiet times

*sigh*

I've been feeling slightly guilty for not doing 'more'... I don't know in what though. well, always in my job hunting, I've kinda slacked off a bit. I'm not getting discouraged or anything, but losing a little steam I guess. It's been 7.5 weeks since I've been back... I have to be realistic about it all, jobs esp. good ones don't come straight away. and I don't want to cop out and do teaching or anything... it's the easy option. I really don't want to settle for second best, and I know God doesn't want us to either... so I've just gotta keep going

180 has been really really good. Awesome bunch of people, the only thing is that HK is such a transitional place, people come and go which is sad, but I guess that means we have to make the most of the time we have. I've been thinking heaps about what I'm suppose to do while I'm here, in terms of ministry and stuff. I've been so used to being involved with everything and knowing what's going on, having a say and so on, (yesyes I am a bit of a control freak), so part of me wants to do it all, but I don't really feel I'm suppose to jump in there and do that sort of stuff here... yet. heh but it's kewl for now, had a talk to Derek last week, kinda like an interview... but I got asked different qs than I have been in other interviews haha... spiritual background, relationship with God and so on. He's a really good guy, makes good coffee too (bonus points)!! SO I'll be praying and seeing what God wants me to do here.

In the meantime, things I can look forward to in this week:
1. Anna comes back tomorrow!! YEAHYEAH
2. Ice-skating tomorrow nite (maybe... or I might just watch)
3. Lunch with some school girlfrys on weds
4. Coffee date with Nat.Box
5. RUGBY 7s Fri, Sat & Sun!!! woOoHOooo

oh and just started reading the Mark of the Lion series... that'll keep me busy for awhile!